moved;TIEDDOWN

one last

2007-08-24T22:45:00.001+08:00

the last.
this is the last post here.
this will be open for all to read.
will officially remove all posts here in dec07.

260 post counts since 2003.
^^
moved for God's sake.
heh.

movedd

2007-08-23T23:59:00.001+08:00

ive moved on guys. (:
see you.

part III

degrading of the mind.

2007-08-22T18:07:00.000+08:00

anyone listens to 987fm? (: if yes, continue reading. if no, buhbyee {:

have you heard lately? school has depleted the human's mind like the ozone layer like it's nothing! songs have been erased from the student's mind to put in E=mc²...
for the sake of all readers, i have come up with a list of symptoms of whether your mind is losing it (:

Symptoms -
1. You have to listen til the chorus of the song to figure out what the song is.
2. You pick random words from the lyrics and say that's the title.
3. You mix the artiste's name and surname up.
4. You aren't sure if you know the song at all.
5. You haven't been listening to 987fm lately.

lol. RANDOMNESS from dinahthegreat.

dc

2007-08-20T21:47:00.001+08:00

went to dc today. cuz i had a record for being late. lol. its just 1 hour. =.=" and they still wna give detention. not bad eh? =.=" pretty boring.
& yupps, am still rushing through my geog proj ^^ its fun.
(omg so boring... rofl.)

words-

2007-08-12T15:18:00.000+08:00

replies to tags -

hannah - i saw you yesterday :o
ly - aha, okays. {: you bumping my tagboard isit =.="
anon & passerby - ahaa...
kiro - i just posted it late. nothing happend.

th.insignificant

2007-08-08T16:32:00.000+08:00

th.insignificant

insults had never hurt so much,
neither my heart been so messed.
still, against you i bear no grudge,
you just don't know the truth, i guess.

why is it you, i keep running to?
things have never been the same since that day
is there really nothing we can do?
must everything go to plan, your way?

you're the one i hold on to dearly,
i don't know wht it brings more hurt than joy.
and these tears, they flow so freely,
with sneers from you as that of gargoyles.

i gave my whole.
you broke my soul,
all's left, an empty hole.
with nothing else but glitterless gold.

always&never

2007-08-05T12:50:00.001+08:00

The girl who seemed unbreakable...broke.
The girl who seemed so strong...crumbled
The girl who always laughed it off...cried
The girl who never stopped trying...finally quit.
The girl who never took a break...took one...& she isn't planning on getting back.

thr's no point in trying whn u knw nth's gna work.

2007-07-29T13:43:00.000+08:00

have you ever felt nothing was changing around you despite you changing yourself constantly, say a period of 5 years? do you feel weary and useless?

if you do... please think of people whom youve hurt. they feel hurt and unwanted. well, like nobody wants to be left out or called in last minute just to make up the numbers. dont you know you are treating these people like shit? just because you are wanted all over the place doesnt give you the right to push and boss people around. & i'd gladly be happy if you'd stop wallowing in selfpity because its getting on my nerves. im tired of you treating me like an outsider, calling me just to make up the numbers. im nothing to you right; stop making us sound so close because im only there with you because youre afraid of something, that i'd protect you, that i'd be the one to die first, that i'd be your shield, your listening ear.
now you know im tired of the way youre treating me, please keep your distance, and stop using me when theres no one left. i dont hate you, i just detest the way youre treating people.
and remember this - empathy.

its a mouse, wtf

2007-07-28T00:10:00.001+08:00

the mouse cursor, magnified 1000 times
this is freaking lame.
click on the link and wait for it to load then you know what i mean.

=.="

gh3yf4gg3rs but creative lol.

*the killer

2007-07-24T20:44:00.000+08:00

*the killer

dig at my flaws, if you will
i don't really care how bruised my ego is
your job isn't to annihilate and kill
i'm just tolerating and tryna make peace

long gone are the pains of humiliation
seasoned with scars of my childhood
nothing's gonna break the tension
'cuz nobody cares; this world is plain crude

th.fallen

2007-07-22T15:21:00.000+08:00

th.fallen

i watched him fade into nothing,
and cried as i couldn't do anything.
once again he has lost something,
& i witnessed his soul shattering.

every action in this world will bear a consequence,
there is no use for pretence.
what's gone can never be retrieved,
& that is something all have believed.

things will never be the same, i know.
but don't be living a pseudo.
indeed, this has been an ordeal,
& i implore you let your wounds and heart heal.

---
& again i've witness somebody's heart drop...
i don't know what to say ...

my folly

2007-07-21T23:08:00.000+08:00

my folly

I tried to let you know,
but you just laughed it off.
that was such a blow,
why don't you just shove off.

i'm even afraid to open up,
'cuz you'll just hurt me more.
collect my tears in a cup;
i've been stripped down to the core.

you're still the most important one,
it's the closeness you thought gone.
you promised me you'd be around,
but look now - you're gone.

just like everyone else,
they come and go as they please.
just like everyone else ...
carved into me are their histories.

what am i?
i wish i had an answer.
things have turned awry,
won't it go like a zephyr..?

The last poem - Crestfallen

2007-07-17T19:50:00.000+08:00

The last poem - Crestfallen

I let you be close to everything
You just didn't know.
Seems like I'm fibbing
Just like you, cold as snow.

Back then when you had nothing
I was there.
Now you have near everything
I vanish into thin air.

Almost everything I do is an eyesore now
So why am i even trying?
It's too late to save anything now
The rose is dying.

I know I'm nothing in comparison with her
She's the one; the angel.
The silence is unbearable
Death seeping into the life of this ~~fading~~ broken angel.

It wouldn't matter if I were gone
I'm no longer significant.
Indeed, this battle you have won
I had believed a lie so blatant.

-Tsukiyume

stress period people! :D

2007-07-15T23:05:00.000+08:00

stress period has started people! be on your guard - there'll be nice people roaring soon! xD

yes indeed, the time has come... stress level has risen, and there wont be time for anybody to mess around. well, that is, for those who have this HUUUUGE upcoming competition. juggling schoolwork, cca, and outside life isnt easy. and always remember,

"in every obstacle lies an opportunity"

as mr wee said. look on the bright side and dont be too pessimistic. its okay to flare up for no reason but its not okay to emo yourself and shut the world out. dont be afraid to cry once in a while, because hey, nobodys perfect, and everyone needs time to let things out and dont be ashamed to do so. :D

dont work yourself too hard either; falling sick will only make others worry for you! (: but if its inevitable then we cant help it =.=" still, take care ya, :D if you dont know, i care for you! ^^v i know im a nice person...

ahaa{: remember to eat your medicine if youre sick alright! i will be worried if you dont O: i know there are some sick people out there browsing through blogs who dont eat their medicine like me =.=~

so then... i'll be going off to do my stuff :DD dont miss meeee~!

&& coughings_

2007-07-11T01:27:00.000+08:00

it's about 1.30 now, and i can't sleep, because i'm coughing. and i've been coughing so badly i think i taste blood at the back of my throat.

what am i feeling now? do i feel a sense of joy that i'm actually going? do i feel sick, because i can't speak? or maybe i don't even feel anything.
and i think i feel that sense of joy. i've been feeling morbid these few days and i don't know why. there isn't any space for me suddenly. and now i feel like dying. coughing blood wont help -.-"

i think i'm in love with AliceNine. and The gazettE. haha. {:

"i tried to be someone else... but nothing seemed to change..."
the kill (bury me)
30 seconds to mars

ddr{:

2007-07-09T20:53:00.000+08:00

its been a week since school started. i guess things are going on pretty well. except for the fact that my life is really taking a toll. i cant stay up in the day. sigh. i cant say nothing much happened the past few days... been ddring a lot of late. and learning more stuff abt me. and crap.

and jasmine. this song has all the words i want to say to you.

I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut
My weakness is that I care too much
And my scars remind me that the past is real
I tear my heart open just to feel

Drunk and I'm feeling down
And I just wanna be alone
I'm pissed cause you came around
Why don't you just go home
Cause you channel all your pain
And I can't help you fix yourself
You're making me insane
All I can say is

[Chorus:]
I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut
My weakness is that I care too much
And our scars remind us that the past is real
I tear my heart open just to feel

I tried to help you once
Against my own advice
I saw you going down
But you never realized
That you're drowning in the water
So I offered you my hand
Compassions in my nature
Tonight is our last stand

[Chorus]

I'm drunk and I'm feeling down
And I just wanna be alone
You shouldn't ever come around
Why don't you just go home?
Cause you're drowning in the water
And I tried to grab your hand
And I left my heart open
But you didn't understand
But you didn't understand
Go fix yourself

I can't help you fix yourself
But at least I can say I tried
I'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own life
I can't help you fix yourself
But at least I can say I tried
I'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own life

[Chorus x2]

Scars by Papa Roach

yes people, i guess i'm doing just fine myself alr. i hope. {:
(and dont tell me you guys are going thru a tough phrase like me-.- like i dont know. and im not gonna insist that mines worser or whatever. im not gonna wallow in self pity. tsk.)

& its going downnnnnnn. down down down, like th nadir.

2007-07-04T23:00:00.001+08:00

don do things you don like to befall on urself on others...n change e way u talk, u may not noe u have hurt someone with an accidental slip of your mouth

to dsad-
i know i mightve hurt someone. & i know nothings ever fair. but look. i have been taking all the shit life's been throwing at me. i havent really seen anybody else other than some, whom i shant say, whos been taking it like me, or worser.
oh, may i know what ive done that i dont wish to occur to me on others? like piercing earholes? if so, tell me what can i do in parallel to that? dont give me the stereotype answer "go talk to someone" because theres noone i can talk to. & yes, please dont volunteer yourself to be my listening ear because i know youll drop off somewhere in the middle, instead of telling me you want to give up. nobodys sticking with me till the end.
you, telling me to change the way i speak? -.- stop telling me to change. im sick of changing. i dont even have my own personality! ive been changing for 6 years now, and im tired. i see girls of my age who are doing so well, and look at me. theyve got their stand and all. and me? nobody really knows me. dont claim you do, because thats just a portion of me. you havent really seen the girl's masquerade of joy.

[EDIT]
here's the replies, if you want to know.

Amishiite: sigh, dinah. relax. stop being so defensive. whoever she was, she was just trying to help. You know... I kinda agree on what she said.
xen: kiro, u so dun uds girls... dsad is like COMMANDING dinah to change the way she talk, not asking nicely... do note the difference... but oh well, u're a guy... not as sensitive as females i guess~
dsad: point noted, take care then

fuck you

2007-06-28T22:23:00.001+08:00

nv mind. im pissed agn.

music always cures th pain

2007-06-28T21:59:00.000+08:00

read adele's blog and kinda smiled because music always cures th pain {:

RULES:
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. Put the last title of the song as the subject.
4. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!!!

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY", YOU SAY ?
{ Love Today -Mika

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
{ No Tomorrow -Orson

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
{ Zingy -Ak'sent

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
{ SARS Free -Phua Chu Kang [its an mp3 file! i can't help it!]

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
{ Home -Daughtry

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
{ I'll Stand By You -Girls Aloud

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
{ Walk Away (Maybe) -Good Charlotte

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
{ MY SUMMER LOVE -MITSU-O! with GEILA [it's a ddr track.]

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
{ 借口 -周杰伦 (excuses) go figuer{:

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BESTIES?
{ The Geeks Get The Girls -American Hi-Fi

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
{ El Nin-Yo! -Tata Young

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
{ Welcome To The Black Parade -MCR

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
{ Teen Titans Theme -Puffy AmiYumi [AHAHAHAHA]

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
{ Basketcase -Avril Lavigne

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
{ Hey Juliet -LMNT

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
{ L.O.V.E. (Missy Underground Mix)

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
{ All Star -Smash Mouth

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
{ S.O.S. -Good Charlotte

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
{ Everytime We Touch (Piano Edit) -Cascada

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
{ My Butt! - Mediacorp Radio, on the Dan & Young show {:

WHAT SONG WILL BE THE SUBJECT WHEN YOU REPOST?
{ My World's Spinning -Tata Young

aha{: feeling a little better but still hurt.

is pleasing people my programme?

2007-06-28T21:02:00.000+08:00

you seemed as if you didnt care abt me anymre on 9th june. you told me you nv wnted t go out with me. and you broke my heart. you actually did. i mean like, if youre not gna go out with smeone, whts th point of keeping th relationship?

you swung th whole mood of th day jst because she didnt talk t you. and its my fault? hello, i only see her whn we go out. is it wrong of me t try t catch up with her? and like, you also broke my heart tht day. i seriously didnt knw wht was wrong. like, everything is my fault.

& nw youre telling me youre pissed with me for going more than 4 ear holes. i didnt pierce because i really wanted t. its because theres no one i can talk t, like nobody really understands me? plus you were like, going going gone. and suddenly you come bck. i really dont understand ths?

i pierced it with memories.
3rd: jasmine
4th: junhao
5th: 9th may
6th: 26th may

im really not ovr all th wounds youve inflicted. im just as fragile as you are. or maybe mre. i dnt want t walk away frm you. i dnt. bt i really dnt understand ths. its killing me. i really wnt t die.

a relationship is based on trust, patience, perseverance, love and faith. understand ths. i knw ive stabbed you, bt youve also stabbed me too. i jst dnt shw it. i hve nth mre t say. im really hurt.

~~and as i type ths, im so afraid something will happen. bt i guess its time i let you knw? im just as fragile? th inevitable happened. you were th reason i kept living. bt wht is it nw? ...~~

{:

2007-06-26T20:27:00.000+08:00

sorry for no updates {: i'm just lazy...
so here's for ya people.

习惯地、双手环抱膝盖、静静地蹲在角落、无声的哭泣、大声的流泪…
习惯地、站在十字路口、红灯亮了绿灯熄了、红灯熄了绿灯亮了…
十字路口、寂寞不再寂寞、竟然我在等什么……
习惯地、把往事当成回忆、所以拼命回忆…
　　我怎样才能找会我遗失的美好？
＊　＊　＊
你认识我时，我不认识你
你喜欢我时，我认识你
你爱上我时，我喜欢你
你离开我时，我爱上了你…

here's it in english:

wrapped in my arms, in a quiet corner
the quiet silence with the loud teardrops
and i'm so to used it...

standing at the junction
watching the traffic light change colours
and i'm so used to it...

quiet is the junction i stand at,
but what am i waiting for......

it is a part of the past i keep forgetting
and because i am afraid to forget, i let it resurface all the time
and i'm so used to it...

how can i look for lost happiness?
* * *
you were just a shadow when you knew me
when you liked me, i just knew you
when you fell in love with me, i liked you
only when you left i started loving you...

kfc & blisters!

2007-06-10T00:09:00.000+08:00

Never explain yourself to anyone, because the person who likes you won't need it and the person who dislikes you won't believe it.

i'll post it later. (:

-gomenasai

2007-06-05T23:01:00.000+08:00

i'm back with a poem. 11pm alr. took 2hrs.

if this is the end we've anticipated,
then why did you let me taste heaven?
if you were going to leave me stranded,
then why was it me, you've chosen?

you once told me,
never to promise eternity.
but i promised you blindly,
but now i see it all too clearly.

i'm back to where i've once started,
back to the person who doesn't know anything.
alone again, to the ground, rooted,
left out there, in the rain, crying.

© tsukiyume

edit:
you were much nicer back then.

december:you asked me to let you be close to everything. i agreed, didn't i?
january:you forgot myurii.
february:we had fun with voice clips.
march:you editted my crappy story.
april:i wrote you a poem.
may:i learnt to DDR with you.
june:(i don't know)

why..?

2007-06-05T20:45:00.000+08:00

Many broken pieces
Shattered, now apart
What can I do to mend it?
To mend a broken heart?

I walk along the beach
Leaving footprints cold and bare
How can I enjoy the sunset,
When there's no one here to share?

There used to be a pair,
Of footprints next to mine.
But they washed away with waves
And the shifting sands of time.

All I can do now,
Is remember how things were.
The good times, not the bad times,
Which caused my heart to stir.

To live or to die,
What does it matter?
While I am in this state.
I didnt know how much I am loved,
Until it was too late.

-taken from veronica.

i don't know. i don't know anything anymore. i said i won't emo again. but i'm not emo-ing now... ~~i hope.~~ ...

frictional sneakers :D

2007-06-04T09:16:00.000+08:00

disclaimer: this is going to be another pictureless post... due to the lack of muscles to press the 'camera' button xD

just came back from f.sneakers' camp. damn tired. omg, i really need to recharge la! i didn't stay up to stargaze T-T and i'm damn sad. wonder when's the next time i can ton pl0x. (can't use sleepover too often ya.)

so yea. i reached home at about 12 or smth like that.. went to sleeeeeeep... but overslept. (i wanted to ddr before going to camp!) so, i just headed straight to church... >.> and had dinner with them.

then andrea and i went to buy the kitkat icecream and got our mouths realllyyyyyy chocolate-d colour. haha xD haha. & we all headed to galilee2 to settle down. some went to bathe and others slacked in the room... and some tried to get the pojector working. (because it wasn't working at that point}:)

after a while valery and valerie got the proj. working! woots! then we watched 'accepted' which was super random can. -.-" the movie ended at about 11.17 which then we changed the show to 'facing the giants'. but then we switched it off, cuz eliza's brother came in to sleep for a while and we girls went to eat icecream & cake.

andrea, pearly and i went to stargaze... but the vehicles were still out! damn noisy! so we went to slack in the room again... since it was quiet in the room, we laid down.. planned to wake up at 2.30 but i was so bloody tired! omfg can! paiseh, pearly, i slept in your sleeping bag! >.<" actually we were also planning to call mcdelivery at 3am.... but i fell asleep. darn.

woke up at 6.57am. ): lol, i'm getting tired. dudes, my english is getting crappy as the minutes go by and i'm getting deprived of sleep without having eyebags which so totally suck cuz i like eyebags and i can't get 'em cuz its in my genes i guess so i'm gonna end this as i went home to blog with crappy english about my camp because i didn't take pictures which also sucks alot and i want to ddr omg i want to sleep!

ohana & sanctuary

2007-06-03T13:28:00.000+08:00

disclaimer: this is going to be a pictureless entry. hope you don't mind. ;D

yes, 2nd june was the ohana/sanctuary outing/chalet together:D (maplestory guilds. yea ^^v) it so totally rocked. but if only i wasn't so anti, it would've been fun. i didn't take pictures because i didn't feel like taking =x aw, sorry dudes.

so i met justin to go to pasir ris together. we reached there an hour early, so we went to walk around the mall. LOL, the way the escalators are placed, it's as if, to get from one escalator(going up) to another(going up), you'll pass by almost all the shops on the level. and vice versa. lol, then justin spotted a ZoneX. he said it must have a ddr machine, so we went to crash ZoneX.

:D yay, they have it! but it was dancedancerevolution7thmix... dunnoe whatwhatwhat so damn long name i couldn't be bothered to read but notice the number. (: $1/person, 5 songs. the machine didn't have many songs... well at least it had breakdown xD yay it rocked so hard. and i can clear afronova in standard. ~~i rock!~~

then we went back to the station; the meeting point. we met edgewalker, zixiang(?) and our fellow sancturions. and the other ohanians. LOL, the way justin described LordSaSa was so ....... i thought SaSa was some young kiddo-.-" ROFL! so anyway, it was one huge group that headed for downtowneast. (:

we went into the chalet and then had the icebreaker game... and amazing race... which so totally sucked because my mind wasn't in that timeframe-.-" i wasn't even psyched for the sudoku challenge pl0x. which shows how damn off i was at that time. maybe i was too hungry =x

okay! so then 7oclock was like, so SLOOWWWWWW... and i didn't eat much (at least i ate). so did wendy, whose youth i had eaten (for i am pianus)[private joke]. LOL... then from 7.30~8.30 wendy and i slacked in the chalet with the aircon and the telly.. watching school of rock on channel 5. haha. after that i went out and watched the guys play taiti. lol... about 9.50,10oclock then the money came in. the guys were speaking in thousands. (they were playing with mesos) so it sounded like:

justin: "HAHA! i win! how many cards?"
zixiang: "eeyur, 2 cards. nvm, 6k only."
gerald: "!!! 6 cards! omg! 18k sia!"
ezam: "-.- see my combo... *shows 10 cards* nvm, 30k only."

they sounded like rich people okay! playing with thousands...

at first justin was on the winning streak, with close to 100k. then zixiang turned everything around... and he won 300k++ while the rest were all negative numbers... lol! when ezam joined then did everyone realise they were just pushing the negativity around... and there wasn't anyone getting positive numbers... (because of zixiang la) LOL, i tried taiti.. but i couldn't understand. darn it, gerald had beginner's luck I DON'T HAVE!! @!#&$#*

so anyway, we played taiti from 10.15 to 12.44... where we headed to mac's to have some supper. we met aunty justene, randall's mother, who also played maple. WTH, such a funky mother! x3333 i like! -.-lol. then i dunnoe why, suddenly i went a little sot... justin told me to rest a while.. cuz it was okay, as he could carry me...

after a while, justin tapped me. he asked me to go to the chalet to sleep. he carried me back, like piggyback. x3 lol. it was like 5am when he woke me again. then i stoned at some quiet corner for a damn long time. like i had autism or smth lidat. then when ezam woke up, i joined the crowd. i learned a few cool games like:
"bang! who died?"
"what's next?"
"how many sheeps jumped over the wall?"
and a few other quite mind boggling games. ;) it's only fun to play with people who konw how to play. "bang! who died?" is a common game. "how many sheeps jumped over the wall?" is quite hard. you need to listen carefully. "what's next?" is a damn qian bian game can! it's a fucking cool game you will never quite understand.

then i went back... since ezam lived in jurong, she send justin and i to the jurong east station and went home. lol. damn tired can.

love you kor(: you rock.

fuck phobias.

2007-06-01T18:50:00.000+08:00

I COULD'VE JUST LEFT THE FIRE BURNING AND LET MY PHOBIA OVERWHELM ME AND LET THE HOUSE BURN DOWN.

EH FUCK YOU LAH. YOU WERE HOME FIRST, SO OBVIOUSLY YOU HAVE TO COOK DINNER. FUCK YOU LAH! EVERYFUCKINGBODY KNOWS I HAVE A HELLOT OF PHOBIAS, AND YOU JUST SAT THERE WHEN I FUCKING SCREAMED, "FIRE!" EH FUCK YOU LAH! NOW I HAVE NO FUCKING APPETITE. GO ENJOY YOUR DINNER. I HATE YOU, I HOPE YOU DROP DEAD!

OKAY, FOR THOSE WHO DON'T KNOW ABOUT ME AND FUCKING FUCKED UP LOT OF PHOBIAS, LET ME SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU IN YOUR FUCKING FACE NOW.

I HAVE:

1. ACHLUOPHOBIA (LYGOPHOBIA, MYCTOPHOBIA, SCOTOPHOBIA)
fear of the dark.

2. AEROACROPHOBIA (ALTOPHOBIA) or
fear of high open places.

3. AVIOPHOBIA (AVIATOPHOBIA, PTEROMERHANOPHOBIA)
fear of flying.

4. BATHOPHOBIA
fear of depth.

5. CLEITHROPHOBIA (CLEISIOPHOBIA)
fear of being locked in an enclosed place.

6. COIMETROPHOBIA
fear of cemeteries.

7. COULROPHOBIA
fear of clowns.

8. CLAUSTROPHOBIA
fear of confined places.

9. HYDROPHOBIA
fear of water.

10. NECROPHOBIA
fear of dead things.

11. OPHIDIOPHOBIA
fear of snakes.

12. PYROPHOBIA
fear of fire.

*EH MIND YOU, I DON'T BLOW UP ALL THE TIME. THIS FUCKING ASSHOLE WHO REALLY PISSED ME OFF WAS SO FUCKING LUCKY I DIDN'T WALLOP HIM. FUCK OFF; STAY OUT OF MY PATH OR I'LL MAKE SURE YOU DON'T EVER OPEN YOUR EYES AGAIN.

sadd.

2007-05-29T21:16:00.000+08:00

每个女孩都是天使

当她落下第一眼泪时

上帝就收回他的翅膀

所以

男孩都应该知道

当你面前的女孩

为你落下一滴泪时

她已经为你放弃整个天堂

kathlyn asked me to type this out for her. many of you know that i flunked my chinese. but i understand this okay! it's touching ...

Azuzephre Slide

azuzephre rocks my smelly socks pl0x.

[=

2007-05-29T19:20:00.000+08:00

aeh, oh-kayy. :D now i shall post about my adventure with DEVILZ yesterday O:

it started off with yingxuan, veronica and lingling at mac's before jasmine's and my arrival. lol, if there's one occasion where yingxuan actually eats, it's my birthday. -.-" okay, so yingxuan just DRANK water (which she always does) and jasmine stoned with her handphone. i didn't notice lingling, veronica and i were eating the same thing until veronica pointed out...

LOL, nuggets rule pl0x.

i haven't mentioned the purpose of today's gathering right? ~~("gathering" used, to sound more illegal.)~~ haha, we were supposed to look for the perfect outfits! sounds stupid right. but hey, i like it. i like mixing and matching clothes... ~~it's a natural talent :D~~ then there was this fascinating shop luh, it had a sale!

guess the shop O:

so anyway, we got kinda bored. so jasmine went to buy her straws.

yingxuan and i thought this was cute... unlike somebody...

i told them to meet in cwp because i wanted to ddr too :D ~~see, i have ulterior motives...~~ but when they went in, they didn't want to ddr! so OKAY la, they went to play "The Fast and The Furious" car game. i know i couldn't drive well... so i didn't play. lol, but in the end i still played. and had outstanding results *grins*

since there were people hogging the ddr machine, i went to play percussion master. lol, i bet you 4 don't know you had a leader like that. :D after the people were gone, i stood on the machine and pleaded yingxuan to play with me... she kept saying it wasn't fun... but after we played, she said it was fun. yay, i've influenced somebody!

after having quite a lot of fun, we headed to orchard... because we decided that there wasn't anything left to browse through in causeway point... and it would be a waste to take a train to sembawang-.-" and so, cineleisure!

on the way there, i jotted down our estimated expenses... and took a few pictures O:

you know we hate this

jasmine & me!

we reached somerset. & had a detour. like we went to orchard emerald & visited some m.industrie.

OMG, crocs!

M.industrie O.o"

LOL, then we walked around... there was NOTHING in orchard emerald la! -.-" i tried scaring yingxuan and veronica. O: lol, then there was this stupid bus advertisement promoting the w880i phone.

it IS funky!

and the "This Fashion" that was closing down...

okayokay, then we headed over to the heeren to find some funky clothes for us :D

the guy clothes look ghey. i love it. why am i not a guy?

okay la, the girls' ones aren't too bad...

girls like shiny things. not me.

WOW, fountain!

we looked around my77thstreet and found some funky clothes :D but it didn't really suited us \: then jasmine wanted to eat chocolates ... honestly, i was kinda pissed... but then i just went along... since there were clothes in cineleisure.

then veronica just had to pull me in to a Levi's store. obviously we can't afford anything in there... so i went in there to humour myself with the prices. since i was the leader, the members will follow me into any store i go into. and in this case, they followed me into the Levi's store... HAHA, and yingxuan had to touch the mannequin's hair! LOL! the wig just fell off the mannequin's shiny bald head. OMG, i laughed too hard to notice what happened... but i know yingxuan managed to put it back. LOL, didn't take picture due to me laughing. & then we headed to cineleisure.

her shirt is cool pl0x =3= darn, she moved.

we found the shirt we needed in cineleisure.. so YAY! okayys, then we took neoprints... LOL, i forgot to take photo of our end product + neoprint... \:

on our way to plaza singapura, we had ice cream:D yum!!

heehee.

but then time wasn't on our side.... veronica had to go home. so we rushed to plaza singapura. veronica and i almost for knocked down by a car. HAHA! so fun xD
we were looking for Whatever and Anything too. wtf, Anything is just root beer can.

then we went home from dhoby ghaut...

DEVILZ RULE!

AIYUH

2007-05-28T21:24:00.000+08:00

I SHALL POST WHATEVER THAT HAPPENED TODAY WITH MY NJRC GROUP : DEVILZ TOMORROW.
I'M TOO LAZY TO LOAD THE PICTURES.
YEA, GO AHEAD AND MISS MY CRAP TODAY.
I THINK THERE'LL BE A WHOLE DAMN LOT OF PICTURES IN JUNE.

GET READY TO BE FLOODED WITH CRAP, LIKE, EVERYDAY. SOON.

btw, the words there are:

crap ::

1. Vulgar.
2. Slang: Sometimes Vulgar
3. refuse; rubbish; junk; litter
4. Vulgar. to defecate.
5. Slang: Sometimes Vulgar. to talk nonsense to
6. crap around, Slang: Sometimes Vulgar.
7. crap on, Slang: Sometimes Vulgar.

PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN :D

2007-05-27T09:01:00.000+08:00

whee! i went to watch it yesterday with xen and justin. justin booked the tickets, so yea, we didn't have to queue up or anything... & thanks :D for treating us O:

so we 3 met at cwp to have lunch before heading to vivo city. haha, well, not really LUNCH lunch, just some nuggets ... but i didn't eat. err, issues LOL. so after having lunch, like about 2.31pm, we started on our journey to VIVO CITY!! @3@ ~~sorry kor, neglected you):~~

then i got uber bored waiting for the train >.>

a lift(: wow! see where it goes:D

haha, emo guy so shuai O:

and finally! we reached vivo city! well, the first thing we HAD to do was to collect the tickets, cuz justin was worried that we needed the credit card to get the tickets... but luckily, we didn't need it. err, except for the dunnoe-what-code-thingy... ~~somehow i pissed justin off so he went to have some time alone and i really think it all started with me and branched out to xen...~~ err, since he asked me to accompany xen... i did. ~~and the whole mood of the day was partially destroyed.~~ and more pictures!

is there some festival going on? cuz seeing soldiers and fairy godmothers on a normal day, is so wrong, in singapore.

we went to miniature hobby, then to the NUS exhibit, then to vivomart & candy empire to buy some snacks to smuggle in =x and then to find justin. T-T

miss sum! see, doraemon!

the NUS exhibit... wasn't sure if they let us take pictures of the architecture structures... so i just took O:
GO SEE OKAY.. THE STRUCTURES ARE SO DARN INTRICATE.

on our way down to vivomart, xen and i passed by swarovski... ~~bad memories for -~~ haha, saw many pretty crystals. ~~and wondered to myself -~~

i saw ~~lo and behold!!~~ COW BISCUITS! in candy empire.

it was very fascinating in vivomart. SERIOUS!
like watermelons

OMG, see! got big and small watermelons!

the way the cups are hung.. i hope it drops.

LOL! then xen was so amazed by these cups.

isn't this price just fantabulous?

& on our way back to the cinema, there was a car showcase.

xen liked these 2 cars

we were just beside some chair shop... so xen took a picture of me sitting on a chair. HAHA, CANNOT SEE MY FACE:D

OKAYOKAY!! then xen and i went to find justin... and we went in to the theatre and waited for the 2hr 55 minutes movie to start...

after the movie, we went to stargaze... while having ben&jerry's. ~~justin's treat):~~ there weren't too many stars we could see, since there is a heavy lot of light pollution in singapore. but nevermind, the lights at night are pretty...

& the longjohnsilver brings back a lot of memories.

yep, then we went home. it was a fun day. HAHA:D i bet you all are jealous.

1st national robopreneur competition :D

2007-05-25T20:08:00.000+08:00

i sneezed 8 times today. wtf-.-"

the day started off quite suckily. cuz i thought i was late for the meeting in the morning. >.>

YA, today's the last day of school before the june hols in singapore. and as you people know, i'm in some cca called robotics... + my school's niche area is robotics enterprise. so yea, this robopreneur competition was organised by my school. thus this day was OURS to control. hence the sucky starting of my day.

however there was no meeting -.-" we just had a briefing after the singing of the national anthem. since my school was the host of this competition, we have been deployed into different areas of the competition area. like, the hall and the canteen. the playfield was in the hall, and the entrepreneur challenge was in the canteen.

as for me, i was sent to the entrepreneurial side... since miss sum knew my strength was in that area \: we had the popcorn, hot dog and waffle machine. weihao & some other guy took care of the popcorns, qihuang, lingling & i took care of the hot dog machine, julia & some others took the waffle machine.

i only knew roughly how to make a hot dog, like those you eat in the cinema. matthias told me i had to spread grease O.o on the hot dog to prevent it from getting too dry. but we only had butter/margarine from the popcorn, so we used that. makes no difference anyway...

it was uber fun okay! somehow qihuang had a better hot dog cooking skill than me, so he did he cooking, while i stuffed the stick into the hot dog. HAHA =x and lingling went out of our sight ... qihuang had this personality, the one to make lame but sarcastic jokes. so, haha, he played with the hot dog while cooking.

you know you don't put the hot dogs that way

then vivian & enxin came to support us:D they wanted hot dogs! so qihuang took the frozen ones from the packet to cook for them. apparently he didn't adjust the temperature knobs, so the hot dogs weren't fully cooked. and vivian was pissed. not really tt angry luh, just like, playing lor. so qihuang cooked it like this,,

ROFL. so then you know, those hot dogs were frozen. like FROZEN frozen SOLID solid. HAHA, then qihuang whacked the hot dog onto the bar like,,

yep, it was fun selling hot dogs. they were a big hit with the students in my school and those that came to my school to compete. haha. it was tiring! & what a mess we made during the selling period,,

AND WE SPENT 1 HOUR 45 MINUTES CLEANING UP THE PLACE BECAUSE THE WAFFLE MIXTURE SPILLED ON THE METAL TABLETOP AND ALMOST HARDENED.

lingling and i took a breather during the cleanup of the metal tabletop. & enjoyed the peace in the school with almost noone around...

lol. then all the robotic members gathered at the hall for the prize presentation & debriefing. SIGH, my legs were aching from standing too much without moving around too much! GRR!

while going home, i noticed the pavements were being remade. the cement looked so darn cool okay!

**************************************

YESTERDAY MY CLASS WATCHED SOME HORROR MOVIE. VALERY WAS SCARED. AND I SCARED BRENDA.

system down. >.>

2007-05-23T22:15:00.001+08:00

i'm sick.
won't be doing much.
>.>

i know you people will miss my oh-so-interesting crap.
haha.
i will miss you people too.

:D

lameness, baby.

2007-05-21T23:27:00.000+08:00

yupps, we were supposed to go to the ACRES building to paint our mural designs today. but mrs sam said the place was still uncondusive ... -.-" so it was postponed to the start of term 3. soooo ookaaaayyyyyy. there were 'backup plans'. 2e1, 2e2, 2e3 and 2e5 were made to debate on some stuff while 2e4 ~~my class xD~~ was left to make ACRES banner for the booth on speech day.

most of my classmates were like, "wtf? i dun wanna?" i was feeling neutral about it, i wasn't even feeling well ... so i just swayed along... so happy val came to school cuz we had to get into our IPW groups to do our banner decoration. HAHA, our group went sot! >.> plus our banner was preeeeety. i forgot to take picture of it O:

then after our break, we went to the hall to watch the finals of the debate. 2e1 vs 2e5. EH, the reason 2e5 was able to win the semi finals was because i gave them hints -.- wtf, haha.

then mr chong pulled us out of the debate audience to go back to class to continue our banner decoration... but we were already done! zzz. but we didn't return to the debate because it was ending. so we took a peek at our report books. i flunked 2 subs. history, 49.9 and chinese 47.1 =.-"

suddenly mr chong bellowed at charles, reminding charles of his job to clean the wall fan. LOL! there were 12 boys, so they helped out. && the rest of the girls just cleaned the classroom... ~~spring cleaning on a weird day~~ only 2 "guys" didn't help out. lol.

the guys had a problem with the fan. they couldn't remove the blade.
mr chong tried removing the blade.

najib tried too. LOL.

only at this moment, when the guys were really trying so damn hard to take the bloody blade out, then mr chong concluded that the plastic of the fan had melted onto the metal thingy. then the guys went -.- well since the blade couldn't be brought to the toilet to be washed, the guys brought water from the toilet to clean the blade. HAHA.

heh. not bad la. the day was pretty fun. haha.
(what a lame ending.)

oh my gawd SHOES

2007-05-19T22:46:00.000+08:00

OKAY today was fun!

i was awoken by my handphone alarm at 6am. feeling drowsy i went back to sleep and awoke at 8.14am. i jumped out of bed, remembering i had to reach school at 9am and i was uber late. okayyyy, so i smsed lingling i was sick... lol. then i went back to sleep... & woke up at 10.40am. usually on a weekend morning i'd waste almost my whole morning doing stupid things like playing handphone games or just sleeping... or eating. HAHA. i chose to play handphone games this morning. i played WHEEL OF FORTUNE :D and i feel so smart cuz i won many games in the hard mode. HAHAHA.

then lydia came over to my place at around... 12.15pm & we stayed at my place until 2.10pm. we headed to the arcade at causeway point and played percussionmaster and DDR.HAHA, played til about 3.31pm before going to raffles city. [cuz lydia wanted to see some radio DJS...] reached raffles city to WITNESS the 2nd river island store but the DJs weren't in sight. WASTED 45 MINUTES! grrr. before starting our journey back to the arcade, lydia went to starbucks to buy a drink. YA, the scent of coffee makes me DROWSY O: i was yawning the whole time in starbucks... =.-" then we headed back to the arcade...

met justin & we DDRed together. don't like nonstop mode pl0x. and i broke justin's record! after DDRing to our hearts' content, justin headed home while lydia and i went to buy some snacks. i wanted to eat some SUSHI ~~like ikura and ebikko~~ but there wasn't much sushi left in ichiban sushi... so we went to cold storage to try our luck:D however lady luck wasn't on our side. SAD. okay, so we bought loacker's. or however way you spell it =3= then we headed to lot1 to try our sushi luck.

darn. no ikura or ebikko. crestfallen ... yep, we decided to go over to my place, since lydia wanted to watch me play audition. ~~i'm still noob pl0x.~~ we passed by BATA and i dragged lydia in, since i needed new shoes... LOL, remembering the mmv:SHOES [the video has a "fuck you" scream part. dun switch on to max. volume pl0x.] we watched on youtube the day before, we started going, "oh my gawd, shoes." "shoes shoes shoes shoes shoes shoes shoes." HAHA, and i saw this really pretty shoes but they were ~~40(0)fckingdollars(!!)~~. yucks. i need to save up to get new SHOES.

on our way back to my place we were doing the you've-been-shoeD! on others. like saying, "oh my gawd, shoes." and pointing at the shoes. HAHA, and we were snapping pictures of shoes. YA, and there was this man, who was carrying this pole. apparently lydia's "blind spot" was on top. she couldn't see that pole wasn't the bus pole. she REALLY leant out to ALMOST grab it but thank God, her eyes rolled up and saw that the pole wasn't part of the bus. so OMG, she looked like.... ZZZ. HAHA, she kept losing her balance on the bus and ROARING when she loses her balance. so OMG, HAHA. & yea, she played with her hair ...

AND I SAW A BABY WITH SOME MOHAWK HAIRSTYLE IN THE ARCADE.

HE'S CUTE CAN!

yea, and we have this sms ringtone that goes, "oh my gawd, shoes. AH shoes." HAHA. okay okay then i played audition for her to see... so yep, the fun went home at 10.45pm.

oh my gawd, shoes.
SHOES SHOES SHOES SHOES SHOES SHOES SHOES SHOES.

oh my gawd, shoes. *points*

THESE SHOES ROCK

THESE SHOES SUCK

THESE SHOES RULE!

THESE SHOES SUCK!

SHOES SHOES SHOES SHOES SHOES SHOES SHOES SHOES SHOES SHOES SHOES

you know when your life is screwed, everything else is?

2007-05-17T21:46:00.000+08:00

wahlau, this week is damn sucky can. suddenly the breathing space just vanished.

today
----------
we have like, x14 correction for every damn question we never scored the full marks, which is shit. damn you la, chong; we don't manufacture pens and paper okay.
&& then we had some fucking marketing course today. like wow, there was this bazaar to conclude the course. marketing is like, selling, so we sold things. we started with 20dollars and ended with 20dollars and made a profit of 0. wtf, waste my time, can.
fuckk. no need to sleep agn tonight la. i don't mind at all, not sleeping, but i haven been able to get back my quiet energy since march, so i'm gna have a problem here.

yesterday
----------
left school at 5.25 after robotics... some robopreneur stuff happening in school next friday. headed to val's place to drop some stuff off before getting a haircut.
the hairdresser told me he needed to wash my hair, cuz i tied my hair too tight; there was this line in my hair. *shrugs* "anything~" the haircut took about,, 35 minutes.
had a happy thought that i could sleep tonight. then i received sms from juma'ah and lingling. jum were so psyched for the bazaar. >.> went home to change before going out to buy the ingredients for fondue.
passed `minutes to midnight` to justin and went to val's house agn to do some admin stuff in school. zzz, left her place at around 11.30, where sam sent me home in a taxi.... but that didn't mean i could sleep. i had to settle more things.

tuesday
----------
i can't rmb what happened. i haven slept since monday. these 5 days seemed like 1 never ending uber long fucking day. all i rmb was me continuing with my art assignments.
...

damn blogger

2007-05-14T20:59:00.000+08:00

everybody knows there's something wrong with the blogger server & the engineer doesn't even bother to fix it. the bug's been in the server since march... or april? well whatever - the bug's been there for a VERY long time already.

the bug's irritating me SOO much. it doesn't even let me edit my previous post because i'm not even done with it... submitted it because lydia was bugging me to update my blog >.> & i was making my layout you irritating pig.

okay nevermind. i've lost what happened today, except for the fact that it wasn't my day. =.-" i hope tomorrow will be a better day... but something inside me tells me that tomorrow's gonna be the same fugglingly horrible day as today because:
1) i'm not done with my art assignments.
2) more saddening results to collect tomorrow.
3) might have to continue with my art assignments if i'm not done tonight.
4) can't go out and play): [*lydia wants to see the record i've broke on the ddr machine.]
5) something inside me tells me tomorrow's gonna be a bad day.

& point 5 encapsulates it all. haha. the rest are just random stuff... but the art assignment is true, OKAY O: and point 4 is just... something random. HAHA.

drats. i'd better continue with my art assignments. D8 so longggggggggggg ~

<3 MY RING OKAY.

2007-05-14T16:25:00.000+08:00

TODAY IS A HORRIBLE DAY. or was? >.>

it started off with me waking up late, like 6oclock. then, ya, i had to rush through... almost missed the 6.50 train to school. LOL, i was almost late! i've been late for school like... 4~5 times this year already. EEW!

& today was the moment of truth... 成绩公布！*drumroll* was pretty shocked with my maths result [*i didn't study much cuz i slacked too much to know what to study explicitly] cuz i passed. >.> it was my avg result ... only that it was 64 & valery beat me by 1. <.< what the...

then it was literature... & it struck me like lightning. [*"WOW, good english!" =3=] I HAVEN'T DONE MY ART ASSIGNMENT YET! thank God, tcher didn't have her scripts so we had 1 period free, which i used it to do one assignment. haha, thankyou meiting for helping me shade my drawing c:

ya, then recess. sigh - with art assignments not done, it is obvious that i canNOT go out rite. smsed my twin, told her i couldn't go out):

science!! haha, i'm good in science OKAY! so i was pretty confident i'd pass.. i've been getting A1s so far... [*i wonder y tho. maybe the setter didn't set it to the right standards...] hmmm, but i got A2 for this paper. xD not bad leh, tcher said the setter had set it quite hard. yea, hard, cuz there were a few failures... which doesn't really happen so often during science tests.

english. SAD OKAY, MISSED PAPER 1 - ghey tcher's fault >.> so anyway, i admit i hadn't practiced much on answering techniques... so you can infer from the previous sentence that i had thrown away a few marks. YEA one stupid quote question and some `word` or `phrase` or `sentence` thingy... well u don't have to know >.>

next, chinese. antelope. paper 1 was free marks. then came paper 2. lol, 20/70. ya, but there's the listening compre + oral right? i still think i'll fail... marginally. =.-"

AND SCHOOL ENDED ... = START OF ART ASSIGNMENT = NIGHTMARE

headed home... but dropped my fuggly phone on the gravel pavement. WHAT THE FUCK? it now has DOTS on the left side. SAD pl0x. dropped off valery's stuff by the door and went home...

& thought i lost my ring... & wasted justin's 20minutes searching for my ringT-T

WASN'T TODAY A HORRIBLE DAY? =.=

i need colours!

2007-05-14T00:51:00.000+08:00

OKAY. this is so much better than my previous skin.

i'm so happy, can. i managed to read some complicated css and managed to edit it in like, 3 hours. haha. though the image isn't what i'd expected, it's still brighter than my other one. so, yea. i'm a happy girl :D

HEY KAI, MY BLOG'S PRETTY MUCH LESS SCARIER ALR(:

honey♂punch

2007-05-13T22:07:00.000+08:00

today was slack though it's mother's day.

haha, really slack, like woke up at 1100. first thought "WHERE IS MY HANDPHONE." hehs, had to tell justin to change time to 1230 cuz i was lazy to rush... still he reached cwp earlier than me. =3= what the.

then he went to pro trim. & i went to by chocolates and flowers for my mother. see, i'm so nice. =.-" then i sat on some brown wooden bench, waiting for justin. didnt really keep track of how long, i'm guessing about 11 ~ 18 minutes cuz my music player played like 5,6 songs.

yea, we DDRed. haha, DDR is fun can. :D played crazy. i'm a happy girl now. thanks so much, ya, justin. haha. DDR is loves. especially HONEY♂PUNCH xD and, yea, anything by riyu kosaki >.>

I'M A HAPPY GIRL:D

(empty)

2007-05-10T20:58:00.000+08:00

today was just freaky.

i'm unable to believe it. it was plain [insert synonym of "unbelievable"]. i don't know how to put it in words. so freaky.

distant

2007-05-09T21:35:00.000+08:00

never is anything gonna be alright.

so i screwed up totally. and u never wanna go out with me anymore. i'm fine with that. i shall just move on. don't say that i've left you on my own accord cuz i didn't. don't say that the person who was next to your world left and now you're all alone. okay, i'll just be nice and stick around to see what happens next.

you told me u never wna go out with me or my frens ever agn. the time u told me that, i was in outram park. the time u told me that, you stabbed me in the heart. the time u told me that, everything in sight practically vanished. i couldn't see where i was headed to, only xen telling me to move on.

i met her, and she lifted my spirits. felt much better. but on my way home, i saw bits and pieces of us living in the places we used to go together... they seemed so happy.. so carefree.. but in actuality, we're so close... yet so distant... a picturesque little picture we've painted together. now there's nothing left.

i pray that this is a nightmare, something i can wake up from, and when i wake up there'll be someone who'll be by my bedside, telling me i'm safe... ... ... but nobody's gna be by my bedside anymore. .....

如果有一天我离你遥远
不能再和你相约
你是否会发觉我已经说再见

shattered

2007-05-08T10:17:00.000+08:00

my heart will shatter if i told it the truth.

i'm serious.
how do u think i managed to live through childhood without being scarred badly? how do u think i walked through the alleys alone? how do u think i'm even alive now... i lied to it. it believed me and it was easy to make me happy, like i looked genuinely happy. but until 18th september 2006, i found i couldn't lie anymore.

for the first few days, it was hell. everything whizzed by me like darts. then i looked back and it dawned upon me... life was going to be difficult from then on, & i had to watch out for people who'd tear me down after they built me up. i had to take care of my wounded heart after the platinum casing around it broke and wounded it. sigh. it rebuilt platinum with glass & that makes it all the more fragile.

nvm. i shall make that glass really thick. hah. =3=
irritating pigs.

like a boy

2007-05-04T21:43:00.000+08:00

Wish we could switch up the roles
And I could be that...
Tell you I love you
But when you call I never get back
Would you ask them questions like me?...
Like where you be at?
Cause I'm out 4 in the morning
On the corna rolling
Doing my own thing
Ohh

What if I?...
Had a thing on the side?
Made ya cry?
Would the rules change up?...
Or would they still apply?...
If I played you like a toy?...
Sometimes I wish I did act like a boy

"like a boy"
ciara

they never understand, do they? they claim they understand but the truth is... they don't understand at all. they're just saying it to comfort us.

i'm done with your shit, bugger.

2007-05-04T17:09:00.000+08:00

pawn

stanza1:
of all the people who had to hurt me
you were the one to smother me
what did i do wrong? explain to me.
i don't see where i've strayed.

stanza2:
rewinding the tape to check what i've said
still i don't find any hiccup
& you had to dig that wound
now i find no meaning in life.

hook:
yea, i know, that she
had wrecked your heart
but still, there's no need
to hurt me while you heal
refrain:
listened to you, trusted in you
promised you forever, regrets flood me
was all too good to be true
i guess i let myself fall
& now i see the light
i'm done with your shit
gonna take it no more
you're on your own now,
bugger.

stanza3:
your life is so screwed
don't come screwing mine
tired of being patronised
asphyxiated

hook, refrain.

bridge:
twist, warp, corrupt my mind
i've been a sucker for believing your lies
but now that my life's messed
i see the world in a clearer view

hook, refrain x2 til fade

the world has the right to whack me, but it seems like they've stripped me of my rights to retaliate. i don't mind, i can take it. i'll understand why & accept it.
it's been a few months since i last wrote a song. i guess i've lost touch, so this's pretty much like a reckless song.

p/s:
i've never heard you scold me that. why did you have to use such derogatory words. so i don't matter anymore.
okay. fine. i'll move on. i'm not gonna take your shit anymore. i don't even know why i'm even TAKING it for you.
fucker.

selfish

2007-05-04T13:48:00.000+08:00

singaporeans are so selfish.

in the city you don't see people squeezing to be the first. that's cuz business people are too caught up to be kiasu [afraid to die/lose out] to bother to be the first, while walking on the streets, to catch a bus, or the train. maybe they do scramble when it rains, but then again, they usually opt for the taxi.

however, things change in the suburbs. you'll see aunties, usually seen in jade and gold and funny coloured clothings. don't even try to take a bus in the residential area when you notice the sky turning dark and MANYYYYY people crowding under that puny sheltered space. give it up. hail a cab while you can. cuz nowadays, the young uns are getting richer. they'll snap up all the empty taxis before you get one.

they say we children, are the future of singapore. yes, that is true. but no one's perfect. we don't always reach school on time. don't these grown ups have basic knowledge of giving way to the schooling kids when the sun is already beginning to rise? grown ups should bloody well know WE ARE fucking LATE FOR SCHOOL. but no, they just squeeze on to the bus and holding on tightly to the hand rails, as if the bus IS moving.

it's just plain stupidity. don't tell us it's our fault that we woke up late or we should have applied for the school nearer to our homes. we wake up late, cuz we burn the midnight oil to study, for the glorious future you all expect every single one of us who studies to have and give to society. but when we wake up late, you tut-tut at us, and give us that you-should've-slept-earlier! look.
HELLO, SOCIETY, WE'RE LIVING IN THE 21ST CENTURY, NOT 20TH CENTURY WHEN STUDIES WERE STILL SLACK, LIKE THE SYLLABUS ARE WAY DIFFERENT FROM YOURS AND EVEN THE PRIMARY SCHOOL CHILDREN ARE LEARNING WHAT WE LEARN IN SECONDARY SCHOOLS NOW?
we applied for a school quite far away, and that's our fault? singapore might be just one DOT on the map, but it's BIG, okay, BIG, in a sense that travelling takes quite some time, and the fact that singaporeans are too damn tense with their damn tight schedules that there isn't anytime to go for a vacation. there isn't enuf schools in one area, so we young uns SPREAD OUT, not like you aunties who SQUEEZE. our mindset is much broader than yours. so wake up.

i'm not complaining. i'm just saying how i feel. and this is how i feel. i noe life's unfair. nobody's gna make way for you. i noe. but it's plain irony when they want us to study yet push us into a hellhole.
damnation, this is going nowhere.

dumb

2007-05-03T14:57:00.000+08:00

don't ask me why i'm like this.

i'm wondering how many times have i said this. too many times to remember. all i remember is saying that in your face and you giving me that 'what did i do?' look. hey, i ain't dumb. you know, you're so damn open i can read you like a book. don't stay open for too long, you might get a cold and catch pneumonia and die young. yes, maybe this fucked up attitude of mine isn't what you see of me in person. cuz i'm a bloody good actress.

yea, i should answer that question. of why i'm like this. it starts with YOU. yes, YOU. don't give me that '-.-' or 'zzz' or 'wtf? i didn't do anything' cuz u bloody did something. like shut me out and open the door for me to enter when you're bored and alone with nobody and expect me to come running to you.

where is the world when i needed a shoulder to cry on? where is the world when i need someone to say it in my face, tell me that i'm not alone? where was the world when i needed it the most?

YOU spat the horrible truth that day, when everyone, including me, was there. you were wondering who else to call when you mentioned my name and said, "LOL, i've called you already. haha, i don't think i noe anyone but you who can come out on a last minute outing." like, WOW. what am i? i wish you'd respect me. even kids from broken families seem to have a happier time than me.

and those with happy families wanna wreck theirs til it seems like they originate from a broken family. what is wrong with you? you are seriously deluded. stupid warped mindset... WAKE UP will you.

why am i like this?
because of society and its stucked up pretty and handsome dolts.

♥ thnks fr th mmrs.

2007-04-30T20:27:00.000+08:00

thank you for it all.

i want to take us places and create memories everywhere.
but if the unsuspecting happens...
i won't noe what to do.
your presence will haunt me and everywhere i turn,
it just lingers there.
there'll be no escape.

One night and one more time
Thanks for the memories
Even though they weren't so great
He tastes like you
Only sweeter
One night, yeah, one more time
Thanks for the memories
Thanks for the memories
See, he tastes like you
Only sweeter

"thnks fr th mmrs"
fall out boy

♥ friday night(:

2007-04-20T19:07:00.000+08:00

YAY YAY YAY
my kor and i have the same phone brand!
WALKMAN + S.ERICSSOn
LA LA LA!

walkman rocks can.

♥ no, i don't cry on the outside anymore.

2007-04-18T19:32:00.000+08:00

YAYYYYYYY
i'm getting my phone back tomorrow.
i missed it SOOOOO much.
i missed the music feature.
i miss messaging in that phone.
I MISS THE WHOLE FUGGLY PHONE!

MY LOVELY FUGGLY WALKMAN PHONE!
T-T"
MY FUGGLY LITTLE PHONEEEEEEEEEEEE.

but i can only collect it after 5pm tmr ......
wtfness ...
STILLLL i get my ~~FUGGLY~~ phone back.
wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

valery didn't go to school today.
just one person missing and it's like... 10 students were absent or smth lidat.
like smth was missing.
like they went for SYF.
like .... like SOMETHING'S .... not around.
SIGHHHHH.
I NEED TO STUDY!

I'M GETTING MY ~~FUGGLY~~ PHONE BACK AT 5PM TMR(:

♥ you'rE all i wanted, all i needed.

2007-04-17T16:53:00.000+08:00

I MISS MY PHONE D:
(i sent it for some servicing=.-")
i'm using some fuggly phone with buttons that malfunction.
thankyou veron(: thanks for lending me your phone in the mean time.
:DDD
~~ilovemytree. shutup juma'ah. ):<~~

wheee.
21st april.
xDDDD
can't wait.
rofl.
i'm uber uber uber happy.
xDDDD
the weight of the world feels like nothing now!
~~ilovemytree~~
yay yay yay.
but i still miss my phone T-T
THURSDAY. THURSDAY.
YOU KNOW HOW LONG IS THAT.
FUGGLY THURSDAY.
rawr.
(:

♥ i'm lying here with my head on the floor.

2007-04-15T11:08:00.000+08:00

[1] You know someone that cares about you.
[2] You have a boyfriend/ girlfriend/ fiancee/ husband/ wife.
[3] You have your own room.
[4] You own a cell phone.
[5] You have an ipod/ mp3 player.
[6] Your parents are still married.
[7] You have more than 2 best friends.
T O T A L: 7

[1] You dress how you want to.
[2] You hang out with friends more than once a week.
[ ] There is a computer and laptop in your house.
[3] You have never been beaten up.
[ ] You never cry more than twice a month.
[4] You are allowed to listen to the music you want to.
[ ] Your room is big enough for you.
[ ] People don't use you for something you have.
[ ] You have been to a concert.
[5] You laugh more than twice a day.
T O T A L: 5

[1] You have over 50 friends on Friendster.
[2] You have pictures on myspace.
[3] Your parents let you have a Friendster.
[ ] You have no problem in your studies.
[ ] You collect something normal.
[ ] People don't make fun of you to be mean.
[ ] You look forward to going to school.
[ ] You don't wish you were someone else.
[4] You do something after school at home/outside.
[ ] You always pass ALL the subjects in exams.
T O T A L: 4

[ ] You own a car.
[ ] You usually don't fight with your parents.
[1] You are happy with your appearance/looks.
[ ] You aren't self-conscious at all.
[2] You have friends.
[ ] Your parents working salary monthly is more than $4000.
[ ] You know your parents care and love you.
T O T A L: 2

[1] You know what is going on in the world.
[2] You care about so many people.
[ ] You are happy with your life.
[3] You usually aren't sick.
[4] You know more than one language.
[5] You have a screen name.
[6] You've gotten awards/prizes/trophies before.
[7] You know the words to more than 5 songs.
[ ] You don't have any enemies at all.
[ ] You are happy that you're living.
T O T A L: 7

Total over all: 25
multiply it by 3 & your total: 75

105%+:A++
101-104%: A+
91-100%: A
81-90%: B
71-80%: C
61-70%: D
00-60%: F

my grade in life:
C

hmmmm.

♥ boombastic

2007-04-15T10:59:00.000+08:00

i know it's kinda retarded to watch mr bean manymany weeks after it opened.
but the reaping was nc16! [plus i don't look 16.]
so went to watch mr bean's holiday ytd with justin.
IM SO SO SO SAD THERE'S NO MORE MR BEAN AFTER THIS MOVIE LA.
rowan atkinson's starting on a new project where he's gna star as osama.
[or as what i heard on the radio.]

current music: i'll stand by you - girls aloud

mr bean rocks la, can.
he's uber retarded.
but the best part was the premiere in cannes.
how all the elements blended in....
like all this was planned.
like, WOW i love mr bean!
=x

♥ go ahead and say it! you're leaving... you'll just come back, running.

2007-04-12T18:40:00.000+08:00

[SHE enters scene, music blasting at top volume into her ears, heavy mascara and all, dressed in black. From one glance you can tell there's something very wrong. An aura of sadness surronds her.]

HER:
(taking a penknife out of her pocket)I'm not trying to hurt myself. It's just probably 'cause you're my everything, and the depth of the wound you've inflicted unknowingly was too deep. maybe... maybe it wasn't as deep the last time you stabbed me.
It's either my acting's better, you never sensed it, or just couldn't bother 'cause you think I'm faking it to get your attention.
(choking on tears)So I guess there isn't anyone in this world who doesn't patronises me ...
I'm not trying to sound like the loser here, but it's true, isn't it? It is... You can say that you didn't know and you sincerely apologise... I'll buy that.
(holding back tears)Maybe all this is a cruel joke. & I pray that it is, that I can just wake up... It hurts a whole damn lot.
So... I guess it's my acting that has improved. I guess nothing in this world will be mine. I guess i'm just a shadow that comes and goes in everyone's life.
(close to screaming)Am I that umimportant, so unsignificant?
Tell me lies, and hell yea, I'll just believe you. I'll stupidly believe 'cause i TRUST you. So yea, you're worser off. But what about me? I wasn't made to be trampled on.
No, I have feelings too. I have a heart. I am human. I am like everyone else, ot at least, physically.
Well, go on, step on me to get higher, step on me to get you places, step on me so that you feel more superior than me. I'm not that important in your eyes anymore. & maybe I should give a damn no more. maybe. maybe.
(Pauses)Don't ask me why I'm like this. I have lost my soul in the process of trying to be accepted by all of you. I have lost myself trying to mould myself to suit everyone. I have lost my inner being. All that is left of me is a stupid hollow shell.
What I really am, right now, is something that changes when the situation gets hard, someone that transforms like a ditto, someone you can't read like a book, someone unpredictable. Someone you call when you need somebody by your side, & tossed away when you've got others.
I'm sick and tired of being treated like this. Yea, you tell me that my life's way better than yours. But you don't know half of it.
... So it IS true that my acting's better. Hah.
I'm waiting for my chance to breathe, my chance to get my real self out, my chance to stand out. I've promised to be yours, forever. But if forever's going to be like this I'd rather die.
You'll say this is part and parcel of a relationship, but what you don't know is that each stab is deeper than the previous, the wound gets larger, each prick is harder to heal. Maybe it'll never heal.
I know your wounds are opened for eternity. I don't want to be like you ... I want to breathe. Will you?

[SHE drops penknife, breaks down into tears and collapses.]

♥ i think of you and it's all gone, like you chase away the storm

2007-04-12T00:10:00.000+08:00

IPW
ACRES
MATHS

RAWR!
maybe i love pressure too much i dunct do things on time anymore.
hmmmm.
gta change my warped mindset.

*yawn
i want to hug someone(:

♥ we stand alone and we know it's gone.

2007-04-10T22:15:00.000+08:00

gone ...

gone ...

i...

...

such a pathetic sister ...

gone ...

...

♥ on the way down, i saw you, and you saved me.

2007-04-10T19:27:00.000+08:00

lols.
i seem to be posting everyday luhhs.
well hahakx.

only for these few days ba.
(:

my favourite word now is tmd.
but i shout MA DE.
hehekx.
i'm not okay, i promise(:

♥ we could leave this town and run forever.

2007-04-09T20:41:00.000+08:00

it IS just me.
i have to stop thinking so much.
hell yeah it hurts when i think.
hmmmmm....

it's not easy to rhyme leh.
i use a rhyming dictionary rofl.
funny.
i saw this entry when i rhymed `eternity`:
`amy`.
ROFL. idunctseehowitrhymes.
whatever =.-"

i dunct like to write poems outside...
especially when the inspiration comes when i'm having fun.
then it's hard to jot it down and then rhyme it at home.
it's difficult.

♥ thanks for watching as i fall.

2007-04-09T00:25:00.000+08:00

in·sane /ɪnˈseɪn/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[in-seyn]
–adjective
1. not sane; not of sound mind; mentally deranged.
2. of, pertaining to, or characteristic of a person who is mentally deranged: insane actions; an insane asylum.
3. utterly senseless: an insane plan.

mentally exhausted to think of what to do next.

♥ you're the one mistake i really didn't mind.

2007-04-08T23:14:00.000+08:00

is it just me, or are there more couples as the days go by?
it's just me right?
i'm imagining things, right?
...
thinking too much creates a huge chasm in my mind.
from the world and i.

i losing my touch...

♥ i wanna hold you but my senses tell me to stop.

2007-04-08T22:24:00.000+08:00

andrea asked lydia and i out to the euro fun fair. at sengkang.
i think most of the people should know. [it's a kinda fun fair that has amazing things.]
as you know i have aeroacrophobia. and well a little motion sickness.
& with that i should know better than to sit some stuff that ricochets me off the ground.
still i went to sit the sky rider[smth that swings you in the air at about 80degrees(assuming the ground is 0degrees) at super high speed and it goes up and down] and lethal weapon[it's the common thrill rides that goes round and round, up and down.].

sky rider wasn't that bad.
it went off pretty smoothly.
i think the ride time was a little too short.
at first it went slowly[duh.].
then it went faster[=.-"].
and it went a a kinda high speed and i started to get dizzy.
then my heart went cold. physically.
i couldn't control my breathing. i dunct know why either.
my eyes closed on instinct and i felt me go faint.
i dunct really remember what really happened next.
my body was controlling itself=.-" i think. cuz i dunct rrlie rmb doing this.
soon the ride slowed down.
it was windy though.
***
when i got off i couldn't stand properly.
i was uber dizzy.
thank God for andrea and her fox candy xD
[3 tix; $7.50]

1 ride just wasn't enough for them.
andrea wanted to sit the vortex.
my gosh, i'll so totally faint if i sit that one.
crazy.
so lydia suggested lethal weapon.
it didn't look intimidating, so i gave it a go.
andrea wasn't the least bit scared. rawr.
so i made her take the side, since she wanted the thrill.
i sat in the middle of andrea and lydia.
i thought i could open my eyes in this ride but was proven wrong when it started.
***
it went left, right, left, right, stopatthetop, and VOOOM we went down.
oh my gosh i felt my stomach being pulled out of me and all the air in my mind compressed.
this pain continued on for the rest of the ride and slowly faded when the ride slowed.
but damn, i lost almost all the sanity in me by the 3rd time it went down.
i could take it no more.
i screamed. [lah.]
my head hurted alot.
i felt like i had no stomach.
the ride time was hell.
i felt like there was no end to it.
what's worse was that it'll go in 2 directions.
siao la.
...
[2 tix; $5]

for andrea and lydia, i'd done things i'd never do.
it's a phobia, not a trauma.
it's hell.
hell.

♥ you took everything while i was staring at the sun.

2007-04-07T02:06:00.000+08:00

changed my skin.
wasn't expecting this.
was looking for some cold, hard, unfeeling skin.
but the skins were crap.
by the time i saw this i alr cooled down.
so yea, i jz took it.

anyways i'm random.
can't help it.
that's the way i am and that's something you can never be.

♥ i don't like illusions i can't see them clearly.

2007-04-04T00:38:00.000+08:00

this is sad.

what i did for love

it's some love story.
i took some time to read...

♥ i could be brown, i could be blue, i could be violet sky.

2007-03-27T20:28:00.000+08:00

Achluophobia - Fear of darkness.
i can control myself if it's darkness for a half a minute.
i might start crying and go delirious if i'm in the dark for too long.

Acrophobia - Fear of heights.
i was born with this.
my first phobia i've ever known.
i dunct noe why; i'm just afraid.

Agliophobia - Fear of pain.
if they numb it i won't be afraid.
if they dunct i'll go delirious too.

Claustrophobia - Fear of confined spaces.
i'm fine in the cupboard.
but not an enclosed room, like those in woodbridge...
not only will i go delirious and cry, if there's a way to harm myself i would.

Coulrophobia - Fear of clowns.
I'M JUST AFRAID OF THEM EVEN LOOKING AT THAT WORD.
OMFG I'M FEELING IT CRAWL INTO ME.
TEARS WELLiNG UP ALR.

Necrophobia - Fear of death or dead things.
i'm even afraid of the game `house of the dead 4`
they look freaky.
that's why i dunct watch horror movies.

Pteromerhanophobia - Fear of flying.
i've got aeroacrophobia, not just acrophobia.

Wiccaphobia - Fear of witches and witchcraft.
they are FREAKY!

♥ you filthy rotten hound, it's badder than it sounds. believe me.

2007-03-25T21:54:00.000+08:00

it's 9.55pm, 25th march 2007
my heart is in a current mess.
i don't know what i'm actually feeling now.
do i make myself sound like some kinda loser?
am i trying to act like i'm not a freak?
is that the message the world is trying to get into me?
...
i AM deluded.
do i look like i have a choice?
i noe some of you have a worser time.
mine isn't just like that.
I’m shaking.
And you can’t see me.
As usual,
you are absorbed in your impenetrable universe
in which you’re closing yourself,
involuntary,
when you want to get rid of me.

It’s ok,
I’m used to it…

Nothing special for me to see you
looking at me with two glacial eyes and a waning smile,
not realising that you’re not feeling anything for me anymore.
hell yeah,
I can’t let go,
I’m holding you tight like I do with my own life,
my own illusions, thoughts, hopes,
all that makes this little, disgusting, trifling, unimportant person
that I represent.

And you know why?
Because I can see my own reflection in you.
I can see the same disfigured face,
the same tired eyes,
muddled after a white night in which you contemplated your sadness.
The same shallow, bare, funny universe…

But you keep it hidden like it’s your most important thing.
I forgot who I am.
I can’t be you.
Who are you?!

You don’t love me,
but you haven’t realised it yet.
You wake up in the morning and,
as a habit,
you think about me.

You tell me you love me.
You’re lying.
You’re lying to me…
You can’t hear me,
you can’t hear my weak voice
asking with its last powers for help.

You live with the certainty,
inducted by yourself,
that everything is just ok, right?
'Cause that’s what everyone sees…
But all of this, of course,
because we’re so much alike.

You may not realise it,
but maybe you’re watching your own soul
as it fades away and you’re not saying anything,

you’re ignoring it,
you resign,
you close your eyes,
you turn your back…
Why?
Because you’re afraid to fight,
you’ve always been…
Oh,
I know you so well…
Yes,
don’t hide from me,
I’ve seen you.
You’re sitting here,
in front of me,
naked,
vulnerable,
without the ability to reach for your mask.

It’s too late.
Now I know who you are.
And I calmed down,
you’re not me…

Not from now on.
I now despise you so much
that I’ll ignore you every time I will see you.
You don’t realise how much you’ve hurt me
with your ignorance and arrogance.
With your continuous run from reality.
In fact, why am I blaming you?!
I’m the one that hurt myself…
I’m crying,
and you don’t know why.
As usual…
Yeah well,
I’m crying because I can’t make you disappear.
You’re not leaving.
You’re sitting there,
with a satisfied grin,
making fun of me.

Probably you’re counting your won battles with me…
Yeah, another deja-vu.
Please,
turn your back while I’m dressing.
Leave me some time to put on my mask.
Please let me take my heart back from the floor,
along with the hopes that disperse slowly in the choking air.
Who did you say you are??

♥ she's so stupid, what the hell were you thinking?

2007-03-20T17:41:00.000+08:00

[Chorus]
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I don’t like your girlfriend!
No way! No way!
I think you need a new one
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I could be your girlfriend

Hey! Hey! You! You!
I know that you like me
No way! No way!
No it’s not a secret
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I want to be your girlfriend

[Verse 1]
You’re so fine
I want you mine
You’re so delicious
I think about ya all the time
You’re so addictive
Don’t you know what I could do to make you feel alright?
Don’t pretend I think you know I’m damn precious
And Hell Yeah
I’m the motherfucking princess
I can tell you like me too and you know I’m right

[Bridge]
She’s like so whatever
You could do so much better
I think we should get together now
And that’s what everyone’s talking about!

[Chorus]
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I don’t like your girlfriend!
No way! No way!
I think you need a new one
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I could be your girlfriend

Hey! Hey! You! You!
I know that you like me
No way! No way!
No it’s not a secret
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I want to be your girlfriend

[Verse 2]
I can see the way, I see the way you look at me
And even when you look away I know you think of me
I know you talk about me all the time again and again
So come over here, tell me what I want to hear
Better yet make your girlfriend disappear
I don’t want to hear you say her name ever again
(And again and again and again!)

[Bridge]
She’s like so whatever
You could do so much better
I think we should get together now
And that’s what everyone’s talking about!

[Chorus]
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I don’t like your girlfriend!
No way! No way!
I think you need a new one
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I could be your girlfriend

Hey! Hey! You! You!
I know that you like me
No way! No way!
No it’s not a secret
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I want to be your girlfriend

In a second you’ll be wrapped around my finger
Cause I can, cause I can do it better
There’s no other
So when's it gonna sink in?
She’s so stupid
What the hell were you thinking?!
[repeat]

[Chorus (repeat)]

avril's with her 3rd album!
`the best damn thing`
<333
avril rocks la, can.

♥ i've got a friend, he's a pure-bred killing machine.

2007-03-08T12:15:00.000+08:00

it's 8th march.
12.15pm.
in a really cozy lan shop.
it's really cozy.
it's not like other lan shops.
you can feel the air con...
the chairs r comfy...
they sell drinks and prepaid cards...
and the screen reso is like, uber kewl.

whee.
im so happy.

♥ do you hurt but still feel alive, like never before?

2007-03-03T12:37:00.000+08:00

1.) Where were you when the ball dropped for 2006?
i was slacking in my room, i think.

2.) Are you afraid of elevators?
not really, unless they're kinda closely-spaced and if they stopped in the middle of nowhere, yea. i've got mild claustrophobia.

3.) Do you love anyone?
yupps, justin<3

4.) Has the death of a celebrity ever made you cry?
no... i only cry for myself and those worthy of my tears.

5.) Have you ever been to a zoo?
yea. SMELLLYY

6.) Do you live in a zoo?
no=.- i'd rather sleep on the streets anytime.

7.) What did you do this morning?
wake up, wash up and headed for my house.

8.) Where do you work?
in my mind.

9.) What are the last two digits of your phone number?
57. hahakx.

10.) What was the last concert you attended?
can't rmb.

11.) Who was with you?
me. lols. hahakx.

12.) What is the last movie you watched?
i think deathnote2 ba... haven got much time to watch movies these few days.

13.) What do you dislike at the moment?
my life.

14.) What food do you crave right now?
CHIPS!

15.) Did you dream last night?
i dun really rmb anything. i think i saw someone die.

16.) What was the last TV show you watched?
some movie on disney channel.

17.) What is your favorite piece of jewelry?
this bracelet xen bought for me...

18.) What's the last thing you ate?
erm, some bread?

19.) What side of the bed do you sleep on?
erm, in the middle with my back facing the wall. i used to think someone would do something horrendous to me in the middle of the night so i would face the door.

21.) What color shirt are you wearing?
black tank top.

22.) What is the most interesting thing you have?
hands! i have computer-like handwriting.

23.) What is your favorite frozen treat?
ice cream...

24.) How many tattoos/piercings do you have?
6... but i think 1 closed, so 5.

25.) What's your favorite store?
erm, power9? pageone? actioncity? comicsconnection? xcraft? zinc? op? ???

26.) Are you thirsty right now?
YESH, VERY.

27.) Can you imagine yourself ever getting married?
no=.- i don't see that aspect in my life growing...

28.) Who's someone you haven't seen in a while and miss?
justin. lols.

29.) What did you do last night?
sleep la. well, that's not normal for me, but i was really exhausted.

30.) Do you care what people think about you?
yes.

31.) Have you ever done something to instigate trouble?
yes.

32.) Do you like your nose?
erm, yes.

33.) What color is your bedroom?
cool lime(:

34.)Do you like pedicures?
never gone for one. won't like it.

35.) Where do you live?
somewhere on a planet in the milky way!!

36.) Are you an aggressive driver?
in the arcade, yes.

37.) Who's your crush?
ME!! jkjk. =x

38.) Do you like the person who posted this last?
u sayng adele? well, okay la.

39.) Do you know their Birthday?
who? i noe most of my frens' birthdays.

40.) What is the thing you'd want to change most about yourself?
my life.

41.) What color is your car?
it's coated in invisible ink.

42.) What do you smell like right now?
chamomile, aloe vera and passion flower. my shampoo!

43.) What is your favorite color?
black.

44.) Do you like mustard?
erm, no.

45.) What do you tell yourself when times get hard?
don't get caught up in yourself. look at the bigger picture. this is just some crap u bumped into.

46.) Would you ever sky dive?
no. u siao ah! i've got aeroacrophobia.

47.) What size bed do you sleep on?
queen=x

48.) What character from a movie/TV most reminds you of yourself?
i dun think there's anyone ba...

49.) Have you ever bid for something on ebay?
no.

50.) What do you think of Angelina Jolie being pregnant?
she's gna lose her figure. lols.

51.) Do you enjoy giving hugs?
to certain people, yea. i don't give hugs randomly tho i'm uber random.

52.) Would you consider yourself to be fashionable?
yupps, oni tt i dun hav the money to buy my those stuff.

53.) Do you own a digital camera?
nt mine.

54.) Who is your favorite Star Wars character?
me. jkjk. none.

55.) Does it annoy you when someone says they'll call but never do?
not really. they do that to me all the time.

56.) Which books, if any, make you cry?
i don't cry easily so this book really kicked me hard.
My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult. and justin cried too. so i'm normal.

57.) Do you ever feel guilty after eating meat?
no. i'm not vegetarian.

58.) If you had been born the opposite sex what would your name have been?
Randy. Emlyn. anything else but those tt start wid D.

♥ i don't wanna be the last, i don't wanna be the first.

2007-03-03T12:24:00.000+08:00

Name 10 bands/singers.

1: the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
2: Chris Daughtry
3: Hellogoodbye
4: Jesse McCartney
5: The Click Five
6: Avril Lavigne
7: Bowling For Soup
8: Stacie Orrico
9: Matchbox 20
10: Cascada

1. What was the first song you ever heard by 6?
sk8r boi (:

2. What is your favourite album of 8?
stacie orrico

3. What is your favourite lyric that 5 has sung?
"I think you need some time by yourself
Without anybody else
You just need to unwind
In your time machine
You need to go far away
A few years back would be ok
You just need to unwind
In your time machine."

4. How many times have you seen 4 live?
tabula rasa ~

5. What is your favourite song of 7?
high school never ends <333

6. What is a good memory you have considering the music of 10?
when i was alone, all by myself, with nothing else but the radio, crying, i heard this song... and i don't know why i liked it... well, it was the piano edited version- made me cry more.

7. Is there a song of 3 that makes you sad?
erm no. it makes me high, instead.

8. What is your favourite lyric that 2 has sung?
"You can't let it get away
Let it out, let it out
Don't get caught up in yourself
Let it out..."

10. How did you get into 3?
987fm. lols.

11. What was the first song you heard by 1?
FACE DOWN <33333333

12. What is your favourite song by 4?
Just so you know !

13. How many times have you seen 9 live?
have they started tours?

14. What is a good memory you have concerning 2?
Justin! can't rmb why tho.

15. Is there a song of 8 that makes you sad?
(there's gotta be) more to life. and i don't noe why too.

16. What is your favourite album of 5?
Greetings from the Imrie House!

17. What is your favourite song of 1?
FACE DOWN!!

18. What is your favourite song of 10?
Everytime we touch (piano edit)

♥ moving on, it's my time.

2007-02-27T20:46:00.000+08:00

it's 27th february.
8.46pm.
flunked my chinese and maths.
veh weak.
see what 0 in 48 hrs of sleep can do to you.
plus a 2km run, 27 push ups and 27 crunches.
it's a wonder i made it through the day.

managed to finish my proposal with the help of eleda and adnerb :)
i hope i can make it into angels.
sigh.

justin's having some 'headache'.
it hurts so bad he doesn't wna go out.
even to see a doc.
praying hard that he's fine.

haven touched r0xettE for 2 days alr.
these 2 days have been like shit!
haven been able to get sufficient rest...
projects hit me like the hard waves of the sea crashing down upon me.

i want to sleep...
yet i dun want to.

i've got this feeling that there's something i haven done yet...
but i don't rmb?

oh my gosh...
my eyes are burning.

♥ i want to get away to our sweet escape.

2007-02-25T15:02:00.000+08:00

its 25th february.
3.02pm.
r0xettE's lvl 42.
with maxed sb.
a few scrolled equips.
made 2.5m on opening first store.

proposal waiting to be completed by monday night.
brains aching alot.

miss justin.

18hrs of slp in 7 days.
trying to stay focused.

i do not have schizophrenia.
i do not have a boyfriend.

i am sad.
i am not happy.

i have a handphone.
my handphone is not 3G.

i am of average height.
i think i'm underweight.

this post is full of simple sentences.

i feel tired.
i don't feel awake.

i need some rest.
i can't get it.

i need help.
i don't know where to get it.
it's not that simple as it looks.
it's deep.

i don't know why am i so pessimistic.
i want to be optimistic.

i think i'm at the nadir of my life.
they think i'm near the zenith.

i need someone.
i don't know where to find that person.
i need that someone physically.

i'm falling.
someone catch me please?

♥ my pain, your thrill.

2007-02-11T23:00:00.001+08:00

- -

do i have schizophrenia?

♥ forced to think that hell is a place called home.

2007-01-30T20:56:00.000+08:00

what the fuck?
i know all of you are just patronising me.
you don't really care.
now everything's going down.
not only do i have to face ignoramuses and schadenfreudes daily
i have to take care of my 3 meals with $4/day.

but who cares?
i'm dying anyway.
my social life's gonna fade away any moment now.
i'm already upset i don't have a proper childhood
what now?
you're just gonna take away my teenage life?
then my adulthood?
and continue haunting me til the day i'm long dead and buried?
too much!

don't tell me to get a grip.
i am, okay. i'm trying.
if i weren't i'd be self-multilating.
FUCKTHEWORLD.
what the fuck is wrong with all of you?
do i have to put on a false front to be accepted?
who will accept the real me inside?
who's gonna hear my cries and help?
who the hell cared if i were missing?
NOONE!
don't patronise me by saying "i'll die if you die."
cuz it's a lie! you won't really die if i died!
i've seen through your facade,
you can stop your hypocrisy.
i can see through it, like through silk.
i'm just playing along to see if i can change it all,
but you keep stabbing me.

FUCKTHEWORLD! LIFE'SABITCH!
noone's gonna bother!
stop patronising me!
it hurts alot, okay?!
it's always like this
and at the end of the day noone'd notice if i were missing.
you use me and forget me and come bck when you need me.
what the hell?
what the hell?!
what am i, in your eyes?!
i don't want to be a tool - i never asked to be one.
i didn't even volunteer - you forced me.
what is wrong with everyone?
what is wrong?
does everyone abhor the real me that much?
must i really hide?

why?
why??
why???

♥ no, no, no, you know it will always just be me.

2007-01-27T14:02:00.000+08:00

okays.
so i can't lie to myself anymore.
it's not working anymore.

no one cares about my feelings; they just go ahead with whadever they're doing.
no one bothers about my thoughts; they just do whad they think i'd think.
no one remembers me; they only remember me when they need me.
no one thinks about my opinion; they listen to others' but not mine.
everyone thinks i'm having a great time but i'm not.
everyone thinks i'm alright when they've stabbed me time and again.
everyone thinks i'm all cool-headed so they just hit me with crap.
everyone thinks i'm crazy but i'm not; i'm trying to fit in.
all of you just throw your burden onto me & think i can fix it.
all of you ignore me; you think i'm fine with my other frens when i dun have any single one.
all of you snub me out when you have your friends.
then come crying to me when you have no one left.

what about me? it's always YOU YOU YOU.
do i even have someone or anyone?
i don't!
i'm all torn up, flakes of me all over the place.
i can't retrieve them, even if i could, i can never put them back into place.
don't tell me you'll try to; you don't really mean it, do you.
THIS is how i feel all the time.
~~i'm so hurt deep inside.~~
i don't know anything anymore.
i'm losing my touch from this world.

to put it simply,
no one loves me; it's all an act. stop your hypocrisy.
everyone thinks i'm alright; no i'm not. open your eyes.
all of you ostracize me; i can tell. don't tell me you don't.

i can't take this anymore.

2007-01-27T13:40:00.000+08:00

i'm really bored.

IN THE PAST 24 HOURS , HAVE YOU ..

1.) cried ??
yes&no.

2.) wore jeans ??
yes&no.

3.)met someone ??
nicole.

4.) done laundry ??
no.

5.)went hunqry ??
yea.

6.)talked to anyone on the phone ??
yea.

7.)said "i love you" ??
no.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN :

8.)yourself ??
rarely.

9.) your friends ??
some of them somehow

10.) tooth fairy ??
no.

11.)destiny / fate ??
no.

12.) qhosts ??
no.

13.) UFOs ??
roswell?

14.) do u ever wish u had another name ??
duh.

15.) do u like anione ??
no. [refer to previous post.]

16.) which of ur fren act most like u ??
none; i change myself too often, too quickly, too silently for them to copy.

17.) when u cried the most , who was dere ??
NO ONE. cuz no one cares.

18.) wads the best feelinq in the world ??
being with myself when no one's willing to be with me. and that's OFTEN.

19.) wad is the most worst feelinq in the world ??
being with myself when no one's willing to be with me. and that's OFTEN.

20.) wad tyme is it now ??
1:47pm

WHICH IS BETTER ??

21.)chocolate or vallina ??
vanilla.

22.) coke or pepsi ??
pepsi.

23.) love or lust ??
hate.

24.) sprite or 7-up
7-up.

25.) quys or qirls ??
i do not answer hypothetical questions.

HAVE U EVER ..

26.) wish u were a member of d opposite sex ??
most of the time.

27.) qo online for more than 8 hours ??
i'll forget to use the com.

28.)stucked in a lift ??
once. but tt was my fren jamming it.

29.) qo oud wif ppl u dunt no ..
sometimes.

30.) hate a person tuh the core dat u wish he/she dies immediately ??
whad for? so whad if s/he died.

31.)swear ur parents or ur siblinqs ??
i dunct swear.

32.) read comics until u cry ??
=.- only narratives.

who was the last person ..

33.) u saw ??
angela.

34.) u talked tuh ??
lydia.

35.)u huqqed ??
my godbrudder.

36.) hu instant messaqed u ..
lydia.

DO YOU WAN TO ..

37.) colour your hair ??
highlight.

38.) haf tattoos ??
considering.

39.) have piercinqs ??
alr have them.

40.) haf lipstick on ??
right.

41.) have more then 10 flip flops ??
DUH.

DO YOU ..

42.)like someone ??
no. [refer to previous post]

43.) hate someone ??
whad for?

44.) have money on u ??
no. i'm like, at home.

layer one : on d oudside
name: dinah
burfdate : 15o993
current status : single and loving/hating it.
eyecolour : dark brown ...
zodiac siqn : rooster .

layer two : on d inside
your heritaqe : how i know.
yours fears : not being able to suan the person back to shut him/her up on the spot, heights and clowns.
your weakness : lifting up my fringe.

layer three : yesterdae , todae , tomorrow
first thouqht when u wake up :
yesterday- i'm tired... jus wna lay my head down and close my eyes and nvr wake up ...
today- whad's the time now...
tomorrow- pray for andrea's well-being.
your bedtime : when i get tired.
your most missed memories : do i even have memories?

layer four : your pick ..
mac or kfc : mac.
sinqle or qrp dates : depends.
addidas or nike : vans.
lipton tea or nestea : lipton.
cappucino or coffee : green tea.

layer five : do you ..
smoke ?? might try someday.
curse ?? no.
take a shower ?? duh.
have a crush ?? no. [refer to previous post]
think u haf been in love ?? [refer to previous post]
like sch ?? yes&no. sku's like a social club.

layer six : in the past month ..
did u drank alcohol ?? yea.
haf u qone tuh the mall ?? duh.
haf u been on staqe ?? no.
eaten sushi ?? yea.
been dumped ?? no.
qone skatinq ?? ice&roller.
tink u're a health freak ?? no=.-

layer seven : have you ever ..
played in a strippinq qame ?? have u?
chanqe hu u were tuh fit in ?? tt happens often.

layer eiqht : qettinq old ..
aqe u r hopinq tuh qet married ?? [refer to previous post]

i love : God.
i feel like : crap.
i hate : my persona.
i hide : i guess, me?
i miss : the real me.
i need : someone.

list six person tuh do tis tinq :
anyone
anyone
anyone
anyone
anyone
anyone

some randomness

2007-01-27T13:10:00.000+08:00

PEPPERMINT all i wan to is SLEEP! i wan to sleep my life away! says:
dhey tot u 2 couple

myurii ♥ i'm tired. i need a break from everything. no one cares so why am i even trying. says:
they gt see justin b4?

PEPPERMINT all i wan to is SLEEP! i wan to sleep my life away! says:
==

PEPPERMINT all i wan to is SLEEP! i wan to sleep my life away! says:
last time church

myurii ♥ i'm tired. i need a break from everything. no one cares so why am i even trying. says:
uh huh

PEPPERMINT all i wan to is SLEEP! i wan to sleep my life away! says:
when u bring him

PEPPERMINT all i wan to is SLEEP! i wan to sleep my life away! says:
dhey tot u and him couple

myurii ♥ i'm tired. i need a break from everything. no one cares so why am i even trying. says:
ya, lol, pple owaes mistake la

PEPPERMINT all i wan to is SLEEP! i wan to sleep my life away! says:
u and him be couple la

PEPPERMINT all i wan to is SLEEP! i wan to sleep my life away! says:
very pei

myurii ♥ i'm tired. i need a break from everything. no one cares so why am i even trying. says:
impossible.

PEPPERMINT all i wan to is SLEEP! i wan to sleep my life away! says:
yy

myurii ♥ i'm tired. i need a break from everything. no one cares so why am i even trying. says:
i not couple material

myurii ♥ i'm tired. i need a break from everything. no one cares so why am i even trying. says:
anw

PEPPERMINT all i wan to is SLEEP! i wan to sleep my life away! says:
....

myurii ♥ i'm tired. i need a break from everything. no one cares so why am i even trying. says:
if i go into relationship means end of the world mann

PEPPERMINT all i wan to is SLEEP! i wan to sleep my life away! says:
yy?

myurii ♥ i'm tired. i need a break from everything. no one cares so why am i even trying. says:
9/11 will repeat again

PEPPERMINT all i wan to is SLEEP! i wan to sleep my life away! says:
lol

myurii ♥ i'm tired. i need a break from everything. no one cares so why am i even trying. says:
oni tt this time is the petronas twin tower kena

myurii ♥ i'm tired. i need a break from everything. no one cares so why am i even trying. says:
then l8r singapore the ocbc building

PEPPERMINT all i wan to is SLEEP! i wan to sleep my life away! says:
lol

myurii ♥ i'm tired. i need a break from everything. no one cares so why am i even trying. says:
thn suntec city.

myurii ♥ i'm tired. i need a break from everything. no one cares so why am i even trying. says:
okays?

PEPPERMINT all i wan to is SLEEP! i wan to sleep my life away! says:
ok
PEPPERMINT all i wan to is SLEEP! i wan to sleep my life away! says:
lol

a random conversation with lydia when someone mistook me & this guy as a couple.

or maybe someone'd say i too humble=.-

i'm back!

2007-01-11T19:56:00.000+08:00

HEYLO!
i'm back!
i noe u peeps missed me.
well, put tt aside...
I'M BACK!

:DDDDDD

alot of things happened today, during IPW.
brenda, valery, enxin and i formed this group called hi5-1 [hi 5 minus 1]
we chose this group name cuz we wna dominate and annihilate hi5 and take over the hi5 world!
i'll show u our symbol nex time.
and our symbol means...

hi5 is no longer popular.
we are more popular.
we are the B.I.T.C.H.es
[Babes
In
Total
Control of
Herselfs]
hi5-1 is here to
ROCK THE WORLD!

lols.
then after tt,
vivian, brenda, valery, enxin and i went to mac@768 to do art.
we played along the way...
i'll show u the fun:D
1. valery&her umbrella.
2. lawls.
3. the idiots crossing the road.

then vivian and brenda went home.
valery, enxin and i went to cwp to find sketchbooks.
then went to the water closet.
along the way we passed by kiddy palace.
played ard:D
4. the kiddy palace "adventure".

me&mypoems

2007-01-03T22:02:00.001+08:00

a hollow shell, soul abandoned.
an empty soul, rejected by all.
crestfallen, downcasted, depressed, miserable.
to be accepted is just a dream.

felt the emptiness in me again. in class.
wanted to create a story but couldn't find the conflict.
so i penned it down into a poem.
& felt better after that.

then during literature, the beautiful memories resurfaced...

on the night you asked
if my life was torn
a coral of frogs
were croaking before us.

then you asked
if anyone ever told me
i was beautiful
you lifted my fringe
and kissed my forehead.

the first time you held me
in your arms
i felt like someone cared
that i existed.

memories created
on that
scarred past of ours
surfaces at just
a simple thought.

justin shud noe whad i'm toking about.

imma really bored.

2007-01-03T20:51:00.000+08:00

You Have A Type A- Personality
You are one of the most balanced people around Motivated and focused, you are good at getting what you want You rule at success, but success doesn't rule you. When it's playtime, you really know how to kick back Whether it's hanging out with friends or doing something you love! You live life to the fullest - encorporating the best of both worlds
Do You Have a Type A Personality?

sheesh!

You Are Lavender
You are a sweet person with a very soft personality. People become easily entranced with you. They seem to glow around you. You have a quiet energy that can keep you active late into the night. Even if you aren't the life of the party, you definitely keep the party going.
What Color Purple Are You?

lols!

What Your Bathroom Habits Say About You
You are a very considerate person, but that doesn't mean you let people walk all over you. You spend a lot on clothes, and you tend to be a very dresser. However, it's hard for you to throw away trendy clothes when they go out of style. You are a little shy and easily embarrassed. You often wonder if you are normal. In relationships, you are practical and realistic. You have a romantic side, but you only let it out when it's appropriate.
What Do Your Bathroom Habits Say About You?

ah hah....

You're Totally Sarcastic
You sarcastic? Never! You're as sweet as a baby bunny.
Seriously, though, you have a sharp tongue - and you aren't afraid to use it.
And if people are too wimpy to deal with your attitutde, then too bad. So sad.
How Sarcastic Are You?

yupps:D

:))

2007-01-03T20:41:00.000+08:00

& school reopens.
was high in the morning.
lol.
godbrudder sent me to school:D
lols.
he went to disturb the students walking to school...
e.g.:
justin: fuck you ah.. [joking]
me: fuck me no baby..
other students: *stares at me*
wtf la!
i mean, hullo? i study in the same school as the students!
!!!
if they get pissed, i'll die la...

but nth happened.
lols.

survey for fun:)

2006-12-30T15:29:00.000+08:00

1. Last person who wrote you a testimonial?:
** lydia.

2. Last movie you watched:
** eragon.

3. What do people first notice when they see you?
** are you even 14?

4. Do you like peanut butter?
** eew.

5. Most memorable place?
** the field where the coral of frogs croaked beside innova jc. :D

6.Do you read comics?:
** manga.

7. What's your favorite restaurant?
** swensons' :D

8.Do you have enemies?
** yea.

9. You like to go out grocery shopping?:
** =.- no.

10. Can you dance?
** i... dun like dancing =.-

11.Do you believe in God?
** yea:D

12.First thing to do when you wake up tomorrow?
** i won't be sleeping luhhs. i'll be out playing way past midnight.

13.Where are you right now?
** at home. sighhs. folding cranes.

14.Your name spelled backwards..
** i refuse to answer this question. shutup brenda.

15.Where were you born?:
** singapore. sheesh.

16.What is the last thing you downloaded?:
** over my hea - the fray.

18.Are you registered to vote?
** im 14.

19. Do you have a car?
** [refer to previous answer]

20.Do you like roller coasters?
** nope. i've got aeroacrophobia.

21.Chattin with ...?
** myself. [oh no, that was sarcasm]

22.Would you go bungee jumping or go sky diving?
** i've got aeroacrophobia...

23.Are you shy?
** no.

25.Chips or popcorn?
** chips!

26. Are you a good cook?
** quite?

27. Best thing in the world?
** being able to live.

28.Have you ever broken a bone?
** nope. damn, my bones are strong...

29.Have you ever won a trophy
** lots.

30.What is your favorite brand?
** OP:D billabong:D

31.Do you bake cakes?
** u count instant cakes? or chocolate ones? [sarcasm]

32. Last thing you bought at a pharmacy?
** didn't really buy. kor got for me:D

33. Do you believe in love at first sight?
** nope.

34.What's your favorite song[s] right now?
** (There's Gotta Be) More To Life - Stacie Orrico
** Keep Holding On - Avril Lavigne
** Still Waiting - Sum 41
** Disease - Matchbox 20

35.How many pairs of shoes do you own?
** dunnoe ?

36.Last song stuck in your head?
** (There's Gotta Be) More To Life - Stacie Orrico & it changes to Still Waiting - Sum 41

37.Any pets?
** soft toy? nah, my parents keep guppies. eew.

38.Worst Local TV show as of the moment?
** i dun really watch tv...

39.Color of most clothes you own:
** b&w.

40.Whose picture(s) do you carry in your wallet?
** friends:D

happy belated merry christmas

2006-12-26T16:43:00.000+08:00

hahas
happy belated merry christmas!
not that i'm retarded or whad,
i was at orchard playing with snow sprays during christmas, kkayes!
and also i was out with my gor.

lols.
very fun.

updated addiction to music

2006-12-21T01:46:00.000+08:00

addiction to music is a very normal thing.
so i, the oh so fab person,
shall make u addicted to other music that i, the oh so fab person,
am addicted to.
all of u should be ever so grateful to me, the oh so fab person!

let's cut the crap and start the list:D

NUMBER ONE SONGS TO BE ADDICTED TO!
KEEP HOLDING ON by AVRIL LAVIGNE
(THERE'S GOTTA BE) MORE TO LIFE by STACIE ORRICO
SAY IT ISN'T SO by GARETH GATES
RUSH by ALY & A.J.

NUMBER TWO SONGS TO BE ADDICTED TO!
THE RIDDLE(you&i) by FIVE FOR FIGHTING
BETTER DAYS by GOO GOO DOLLS
IT ENDS TONIGHT by THE ALL-AMERICAN REJECTS

NUMBER THREE SONGS TO BE ADDICTED TO!
ALL GOOD THINGS(come to an end) by NELLY FURTADO
SAY GOODBYE by CHRIS BROWN
SOMEWHERE ONLY WE KNOW by KEANE

NUMBER FOUR SONGS TO BE ADDICTED TO!
I AM by HITOMI YAIDA
HERE IT GOES AGAIN by OK GO
TANGLED UP IN ME by SKYE SWEETNAM

NUMBER FIVE SONGS TO BE ADDICTED TO!
I WILL SURVIVE by CAKE
THE DIARY OF JANE by BREAKING BENJAMIN

omfg- i can't stop listening to these songs!

AHHHHHH

2006-12-18T20:35:00.000+08:00

heylo!
lalala
nvr update for very long long long time le!
\(^o^)/

hahas,
lots of things happened the past 8 days.
gt a new kor, shiok mann.
his girlfren damn chio *_*
lols.

then fell sick.
hahas,
i owaes fall sick.
lalas,
i go to stone now:D

:D

2006-12-10T22:19:00.000+08:00

Never in my life had I :
lost my way ard . i'm a good navigator :D

That 1 person can make me nuts, but can make me smile.
vivian/brenda [they're 1 arent they]

I like lines because they are :
straight and neat .

When I am nervous I will :
touch my frinch, fiddle with my earsticks :D

The last time when i laughed was :
when i dropped a big splat of ice cream in mac\:

My curly is :
curly ? huh ?

My foot size are :
US : 6.0 . UK : 3.5 . EUR : 36.0 . CM : 26.0
i've got a foot size converter on my shoe tongue . kewl huh .

Last christmas :
last year lor =.-

When i turn my head left to see :
shoes .

When i turn my head right to see :
piano .

When i look down and see :
feet .

The craziest event ever :
stealing .

I have a hard time understanding :
things i have a hard time understanding .

One time at a family gathering :
i dun go for family gatherings =.-"

You know i like-like you...
oh i oso like-like you . [sarcastically]

If ii win an award , the first person I can thank is:
God(: [no,rrlie] then justin, vivian, brenda, jasmine, enxin...

Triangles are :
triangles ; either an equilateral, isoscelos, or scalene. :D

My ideal breakfast is :
i dun eat breakfast .. but if i do then i'd like bacon:D

If you make me happy :
i'll be happy .

I will stop my wedding if :
i dun even wna get married =.- stupid .

The world could do without :
"it's a lie. this world... the truth is that no one in this world is indispensable..."
kyoko honda from fruits basket \ book 16 chpt 93

I rather lick the belly of the cockroach :
=.- the cockroach would've alr ran away . stupid .

Most recent thing you bought yourself :
jodi picoult's book !

Most recent thing someone else bought for you :
i dun recall .

The last time when i was high :
ytd when i went out with : vivian, brenda, jasmine, lingling, veronica, yingxuan, cheryl, chongling, kok leng, weiping, and gavin to vivo/east coast.

The person I last talked to :
lydia.

Last night I :
was reading jodi picoult's book .

There is this guy i know :
that is a guy . :D

I tell you the person that will make me happy :
hmm ... let your mind wander ~
:D
it's _him

I am listening to :
call me when you're sober - evanescence .

I last ate :
potato .

My bedsheets :
are black .

I smell :
me(:

On my table i have :
*ka-chiiiing* .

My full name :
something something ~~something something~~

The next victims :
if you bother to type this out word by word then
be my guest(:

undefined -

2006-12-08T15:43:00.000+08:00

heyaaaaaaaaaa !
got a poem to share with u peeps !

~ the poem
I knelt to pray but not for long,
I had too much to do. I had to hurry and get to work.
For bills would soon be due. So I knelt and said a hurried prayer,
And jumped up off my knees.
My Christian duty was now done
My soul could rest at ease.
All day long I had no time
To spread a word of cheer.
No time to speak of Christ to friends,
They'd laugh at me I'd fear.
No time, no time, too much to do,
That was my constant cry,
No time to give to souls in need
But at last the time, the time to die.
I went before the Lord, I came, I stood with downcast eyes.
For in his hands God held a book; It was the book of life.
God looked into his book and said
"Your name I cannot find.
I once was going to write it down...
But never found the time"

(:

and then some things u might consider -

Easy vs. Hard
Why is it so hard to tell the truth but Yet so easy to tell a lie?
Why are we so sleepy in church but Right when the sermon is over we suddenly wake up?
Why is it so hard to talk about God but yet so easy to talk about nasty stuff?
Why is it so boring to look at a Christian magazine, but yet so easy to look at a nasty one?
Why is it so easy to delete a Godly e-mail, but yet we forward all of the nasty ones?
Why are the churches getting smaller but yet the bars and dance clubs are getting larger?

(:
that , i am wondering\:

and a story !
enjoy!

One day, Satan and Jesus were having a conversation.
Satan had just come from the Garden of Eden, and he was gloating and boasting.
"Yes, sir, I just caught the world full of people down there.. Set me a trap, used bait I knew they couldn't resist. Got 'em all!"
"What are you going to do with them?" Jesus asked.
Satan replied, "Oh, I'm gonna have fun! I'm gonna teach them how to marry and divorce each other, how to hate and abuse each other, how to drink and smoke and curse.I'm gonna teach them how to invent guns and bombs and kill each other.I'm really gonna have fun!"
"And what will you do when you get done with them?" Jesus asked.
"Oh, I'll kill 'em," Satan glared proudly.
"How much do you want for them?" Jesus asked.
"Oh, you don't want those people. They ain't no good. Why, you'll take them and they'll just hate you. They'll spit on you, curse you and kill you. You don't want those people!!"
"How much?" He asked again.
Satan looked at Jesus and sneered, "All your blood, tears and your life." Jesus said, "DONE!"
Then He paid the price.

and some funny stuff ^^

Isn't it funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell.
Isn't it funny how someone can say "I believe in God" but still follow Satan (who, by the way, also "believes" in God)
Isn't it funny how you can send a thousand jokes through e-mail and they spread like wildfire, but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing?
Isn't it funny how when you go to forward this message, you will not send it to many on your address list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it to them.
Isn't it funny how I can be more worried about what other people think of me than what God thinks of me.

december-ed

2006-12-04T12:14:00.000+08:00

yay it's december !
whee!
you know what that means !
presents !
but i'm bankrupt !
yay !
lalas .
i shud be getting more money soon .
then maybe i'll be buying some more ...
wah lau eh ..

lalas.

2006-11-30T20:32:00.000+08:00

lalas .
played ard with the fonts i dl ytd .
i dunnoe sup with the `hearts united` caption\:

there're more in my frienster profile(:

so silly yet sweet -

2006-11-30T15:05:00.001+08:00

i saw this in beryl's blog and was touched by it .
(:

A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, "What does love mean?" The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined.

Jenny - age 6
"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love."

Rebecca - age 8
"When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."

Billy - age 4
"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other."

Karl - age 5
"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs."

Chrissy - age 6
"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired."

Terri - age 4
"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK."

Danny - age 7
"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more.My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss"

Emily - age 8
"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."

Bobby - age 7
"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday."

Noelle - age 7
"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well."

Tommy - age 6
"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore,"

Cindy - age 8
"My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night."

Clare - age 6
"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken."

Elaine - age 5
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is more handsome than Robert Redford."

Chris - age 7
"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day."

Mary Ann - age 4
"I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones."

Lauren - age 4
"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you."

Karen - age 7
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross."

Mark - age 6
"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget,"

Jessica - age 8
"Love is when papa passes me food when he thinks i have less than him. I could cry when i eat the food".

Sarah- age 13
kids get contented easily :) but it's just so pure love.

I HATE THAT GUY WHO DESTROYED JASMINE !

2006-11-29T22:23:00.000+08:00

...
this is one of those long testimonials i've written to my friends.
but this girl...

i hate those who hurt her!

jasmine.
stop it.
forget about him.
stop saying you're psychic and that you actually saw this coming when you know you're not psychic and that you didn't expect this kkayes.

and we keep telling you to let go of this relationship cuz when you're in love you don't see anything else except the both of you.
we're outside, we can see everything so clearly.
we could see that something bad's going to happen.
trust us, the other 4 shameless toots.

not that guy.
please.

i know this is going to take some time.
if you're in trouble, please find someone.
and i mean it.

i'm not joking here, kkayes.

please.
i don't wna see you suffer like this alone.

we're all in this together.

rmb: if you're gna cut yourself, find toot2.
cut on my arm\wrist.
don't cut on yours.
or if you've alr cut yourself,
we're all gna cut along with you.

you hear me, jasmine?

; toot2

i hope jasmine'll respond to this.
and do smth about it.

the oh so free person spoke to you

2006-11-29T19:39:00.000+08:00

ytd went out with junhao to play again =.="
went to east coast park with his "sister" or "brother" ahhs ...
it was damn fun !

first we met at dhoby ghaut station .
lihui , jingwen , menglan , junhao and me .
then we took a bus [14] tuh east coast road ...
then we crossed the overhead bridge and walked ...
then we almost gt lost .
then we asked for directions .
then we headed to the underpass .
then we reached east coast park .
then we walked to the bicycle\rollerblade rental shop .
then we decided on rollerblades ,
but since lihui didn't want rollerblades she cycled .
then jingwen , menglan , junhao and i went to wear the skates .
then all 3 of them wore the guards .
then junhao and i went to skate first while the other 2 girls slowly wore the guards .
then after a few minutes they started walking .
lols .
then err ... i went to help jingwen lors .
menglan and lihui helped each other lors .
junhao skate alone . [zzz]

the first place we headed to was macDONALD's .
wow , that place was awesome ... [lols]
we headed to the washroom and then ate .

after that jingwen and menglan went to practice skating .
lihui , junhao and i continued eating ...
we left soon after ...
but we lost jingwen and menglan .

however we found them .
and we headed to the left side .
then we headed to the right side .
but jingwen and menglan went back to the shop first .
lihui , junhao and i headed for the jetty .
WOW the scenery is awesome !

then after that we returned the skates and bike back .
and headed to macDONALD's agn .

then we went to play sand .
and watch the sunset .
we climbed onto the rocky coast .
and err , sat there .
and took photos .

then we headed down ...
and i jumped off the rock ...
~~and ate sand~~

then we left east coast cuz the 3 girls had an interview [?]
we took a bus [13] towards eunos station .
then junhao and i left them at outram park and we headed for vivo city .

the first place we headed to was the ...
WASHROOM ! [wow !!=.=]
no luhhs , wash up .
~~spashly the sand~~
then we went up to the rooftop and err .
the sky was DARK . [wow !!=.=]
and junhao wanted to play with the water oh so badly
so i followed him lor .

the water's much nicer to play at abt 5pm lidat de .
zzz the water looked so murky in the darkness with no light upon it .
but there was black light in the water .
blahs .

then junhao wanted to go to sentosa .
so we went .............
but we err ....
took about 2 hours to get there .

he wanted to sit the cable car [omfg]
but , whew , we didn't have enough money !
so , yay ! [kudos to the lady at the counter]
then we decided to take the coach .
but we couldn't find the place where the coach was .

we walked around ...
omg , our legs were smarting alot !
~~but rollerblading is still fun , kkayes.~~
then we looked at the map ...
AND REALISED WE WERE WALKING IN THE WRONG DIRECTION !
omfg , i almost died .

somehow we still reached the interchange and we sat the bus to sentosa , whee !
but... when we reached , almost everything was closed !
so we took the coach back and well , we'll be going there agn soon .
~~hopefully , not by the cable car.~~

then we went to eat LONG JOHN SILVER ! [oh , yay]
then we went up to the roof agn ...
junhao wanted to play in the water agn but i went to sit down ...
somehow he still pulled me into the water ...

then we went home .
this time he had to accompany back cuz
all the other times he left first ...
so mwahaha \:

no luhhs ,
he didn't bring his mp[3] along so he was bored .

lalas ,
I MISSED MY CSI : MIAMI !
THE FUCKING 90-MINUTE SPECIAL !

the genius talked

2006-11-27T17:52:00.000+08:00

mwahahas .
imma genius .

i didn't rrlie study much this year
yet i gt bursary...
im in the top 25% ....

ZZZZZZZ
this is stupid\dumb .

$300 only ...
ndd it isn't in cash lors.

the oh so nice person blogged

2006-11-27T17:02:00.000+08:00

hahas .
so i went to watch casino royale ytd with junhao ndd jeannie .
wahlau , it sucks can .
the other bond movies were nicer .
or was it dhat i didn't have tuh pay dhat made it less intriguing ?
hahas .

so ytd , i was out at orchard with lydia , finding and mp[3] .
~~actually i alr suspected dhat someone would ask me out~~
then at about ... 5.25 someone called me .

so it was junhao .
he called me to go lido and wait for jeannie to knock off .
so i went lido with lydia .

then lydia ndd i ate dinner first , cuz i couldn't find dhat effin toot .
dhen he called me to meet him at macDONALD's .
so i went dhere with lydia .
dhen still cannot find dhat effin toot .
so we played with our fones lor =.=
dhen god knows where he came from , he appeared !*_* [=.=]
kkayes , so he's still in dhat macDONALD's uniform which look so `off` on him lors .

dhen since dhere was nth tuh do ,
lydia ndd i walked ard and err , found a seat .
ndd ate agn .
dhen at about 7.16 , he came out ndd told me he needed to go down [=.=]
kkayes , so go down ...
dhen i brought lydia tuh dhe mrt station .
ndd she went home .

and i went back to lido tuh wait for jeannie to knock off .
dhen i had nth tuh do ...
so i had a small chat with jeannie .
dhen she asked junhao to err .. pei wo waste time .
okei lor ... so we talk lor ...
dhen waited until 8 , when jeannie knocked off .

we were about tuh head tuh cineleisure tuh get our tickets when ...
an angel from heaven dropped 3 tickets for casino royale !
[[i was bullshiting , someone treated us to the movie]]
so we decided tuh go tuh heeren to look for ties agn .

lalas , i knew we weren't gna find any ties agn ...
but still we went to burn time .
ndd wow ! i didn't know my retarded son had such sharp eyes *_* [=.=]
ndd we found *TIES* [wow.]
kkayes , i got dhe tie dhat we both wanted .
we didn't know dhat dhere was only ONE piece of dhat tie .
lalas , the lady gave dhe me tie FIRST. ^^
so i got the TIE [mwahaha]
ndd junhao took dhe other one . [mwahaha]
dhen we went to play ard b4 going back to lido.

ndd we smuggled food in agn .
ohh , dhats our speciality^^"
ndd we watched the movie ....................
jeannie was asking so many questions ...
junhao was laughing at god knows what ...
ndd i was staring at the screen ...

lols .

after the movie ended ...
we realised dhat we missed the last train home by a few minutes ... AGAIN (:
so yay ! junhao asked his parents tuh bring us home again .
ps lors , disturb his parents .
dhen we went to cineleisure cuz SOMEONE needed to use the loo .
ZZZ .
dhen we played ard ...
ndd walked back tuh orchard station ...
dhen halfway junhao said SOME CRAP -
which pissed jeannie ndd me off
ndd we started running =.="

we went to wheelock place ndd we OWNED dhat place !
[mwahaha]
we were relaxing when we heard the security guard coming .
we RAN out when we were almost cooled down .....
dhen junhao's parents arrived ...
so junhao ndd i raced ... again .
lalas , so fun !
dhen i went home first ...

yay ...
so fun .

whees .

2006-11-25T23:32:00.000+08:00

whee .

ytd got into trouble agn .
so shiok(:

i could've taken the bus home but cuz i had to wait for an hour ,
so i took the last train home
WHICH HAD TO FUCKINGSTOP JUST ONE STATION BEFORE MY STATION .
wdv , still had fun getting into trouble .

so you wna know whad happend ytd .

i was lying down on my bed pretending to be asleep
when my handfonehad tuh ring .
kkayes , i was supposed to reject it ,
but i pressed to wrong button lors .
kkayes , it was junhao .
fine .
then he ask me to go out to `walk walk` .
kkaye lors .

then we met at cwp with his fren , karen lee .
[[tts wht he calls her]]
then we went to orchard .
and at 7# karen lee had to go . cuz it was late [[]]

kkayes , then it was him and me only .
whatever .
we went to lido .
wanted to surprise jeannie .
but DARN ,
it was her break time .
zzz .
then we went to the heeren . [[cuz i said i wanted to]]

we went to crash all the shops there .
well , sorta .
then we went tuh 77th street ndd
he gt himself a black shirt ,
ndd i have the same shirt but in white .
BLAH we gna wear tt on christmas .

then we went to cineleisure .
wanted to watch casino royale but SOMEBODY too tired ,
say will bring me to watch casino royale TODAY wors .
so we went to find ties .
kkayes , wdv .

ndd there was this shop called `8percent` that had this nice belt .
so we went to look lors .
then junhao went to buy another belt lors .

then it was like 10.30 liao lahs .
so err .
we went back to heeren to play lors .

on the 4th level of heeren , there's this showcase going on in these HUUUUGE BOXES .
so we went in .
~~WAH LAU SIBEI SMELLY LORS !~~
well , the speaker was noisy ,
so we went and switched it off .
kekekes .

then we went back to lido at about 11# .
waited for jeannie there .
ate some KFCs .

then went home lors .
but
PLEASE REFER TO THE TOP AGN .

so err , jeannie went home first .
then left junhao and me agn lahs .
i was supposed to wait for ~~my father~~ to fetch me de wors .
so we walked to woodlands mart .
then on the way we talked about changing genders .
blahs ! so random !

at woodlands mart we saw a WHITE kitten .
ndd it was afraid of junhao .
mwahahas .
lalas .
then went to wait for ~~my father~~ under his block lors .
then at 2 ~~my father~~ haven come yet .
then my mother called me .
turned out that
MY FATHER WAS ASLEEP lors .

WAHLAUS lors .
then junhao invite me to his house lahs .
err , quite small wors .
no offense , i like my housebetter (:
then so sian , watch tv lors .
quite funny lahs .
then about 15 minutes later ~~my father~~ come liao .
so i go off lahs .
then go home lors .

this was supposed to happen today . AGAIN .
but err .
i had a feeling SOMEBODY wasn't quite expecting me .
so i won't be EXTRA and lalas ,
i went home .
and err , watched tv and lalas .

goddamnit

2006-11-25T23:28:00.000+08:00

okei .

i am SO NOT having a mood swing .
i have discovered my REAL heartsong .
so i'm feeling ... down ?
okei , whatever .

~~but i'm feeling so damn sad lors .~~ that's why there's no colour for this post .

freaking lor .

now i'm so damn motivated to play THAT song on the piano .

BLUHBLUH

2006-11-23T21:23:00.000+08:00

something's strange - *
[dunct tell me dhat's normal ndd dhat i'm supposed to be strange]
[[well yea, i AM strange but dhis is PLAIN strange]]
seems like someone 'promote-d' my profile in frenster
ndd now dhere r pple whom i dunct noe from god noes where ?! adding me.

~~[[ah la la , i'm too famous ! pple wna meet me !]]~~

bluh .
~~maybe i AM famous.~~

lalas.

2006-11-21T15:20:00.000+08:00

#1. Are you a Chinese or English freako?
english .

#2. If time is going to stop, what will you possibly do for that time?
fall into eternal sleep .

#3.Do you prefer a playpool or playground?
play-computer .

#4.Do you usually gossip about others or being gossiped?
neither .

#5.Do you like simple or complicated stuff?
simple . unless it's intricate .

#6.Do you tackle numbers better or alphabets?
numbers . dhey make more sense .

#7.What makes you pissed off?
when things dunct go my way ndd someone thrases everything up .
ndd when dhat fucking bastard shouts .

#8.How was your childhood?
err . no trace of it .

#9.Do you have inspirations without perspirations?
yupps .

#10.Do you think 24 hours is too long,too short or just okay?
TOO SHORT .

#11.Would you judge people by their appearance?
nope .

#12.What is attractive in my eyes?
gothic stuff .

#13.Do you like the day or night?
night . i'm nocturnal .

#14.Do you treasure things that you own or do you have insatiable ideas?
treasure my things . unless i can rob people whenever i want .

#15.If your computer just hanged up with a long long documents not being saved, how will you react?
dhat doesnt happen much anymore . either i dunct type long long documents or i stop and ctrl-c everything .

#16.Do you believe in miracles? Or was it long predestined?
miracles . jesus made dhem happen .

#17.Do you often tend to forget about the past or trying hard to do so?
err . depends on what the past is .

#18.In you mind, why there are colours out there?
because there aren't colours in here .

#19.Have you ever pity those who are real pitiful and shed a tear for them or etc?
err . i have pitied dhem but i never shed a tear for dhem .

#20.Describe yourself as in attitude.
attitude . hmmm .

#21.Do you suddenly lose grasp of hope to survive as yet?
yea . countless times .

#22.Give 3 advantages you get to live.
o1. have the power tuh do what i want .
o2. can feel things .
o3. tuh be me .

#23.What is your ambition in life?
i have lots .

#24.Do you believe in horoscope etc?
nope . jz read it at dhe end of dhe day ndd see the crap dhey say matches what happened today .

#25.Describe music in your life.
music ...depends .

#26.Which country would you like to go when you can afford it?
hmmm . japan .

27.What do you think blogging is about?
writing crap ndd see hu reads it .

#28.What kind of style are you trying to get hold of?
lolita goth . im almost dhere .

#29.When you fail a test,how will you react?
if it's chinese , i'd be so estatic .

#30.Pass this to 7 friends for them to get it done.
anyone out there .

2006-11-20T00:16:00.000+08:00

lalas,
it's bryson's birthday today.

yayness[x

lalala.

2006-11-18T22:53:00.000+08:00

so i went for extraction yesterday .
it didn't hurt much ,
only for the injection part ,
where it rrlie smarted .
and i cried , hahas .

then came the extraction .
okei , so i did cry ...
cuz there was this song playing ...
song : PRETTY BOY by M2M
that is like , my heartsong .
... but only a few tears dropped , luhhs .
lalala ,
it rrlie didn't hurt !

it was like ,
turn , turn , turn , turn ...
YANK .
i swear , i REALLY didn't feel anything !!
but i tasted blood and then i realised my tooth was out .
and i was like , omfg .

after everything ,
the orthodontist just stuck gauze under the area whrr the pre-molars were . (and i got back my tooth !)
they were bleeding . (DUH !)
so it kept on bleeding .
and my mouth was so numb ,
i couldn't close it all the way from dhoby ghaut to choa chu kang ,
which from there i took out the gauze and gargled my mouth .

the water that i spit out had blood ,
so i assumed that i was still bleeding .
you see ,
we believe whatever we see and hear . (that's why magicians can perform their tricks to successfully .)

lala ,
i'm off to fold some more cranes .

so long ~!

lalas~

2006-11-16T20:58:00.000+08:00

yay ,
tmr's finally friday .
after extraction ,
i'll be ...
hmm .

current music : CRAZY FOR THIS GIRL by EVAN AND JARON

wonder what time'll everything'll be done .

i think it'll take quite some time .
so by the time everything's done ,
i'll go home and watch
ghost whisperer , inuyasha , get backers .
then brush teeth and sleep .

so tmr's gna be an oh so boring day .
sheesh.